I’ve said for years that renting is better than buying––
but I just bought my first house.
I’ve been that multi-millionaire who rents, proudly defending why homeownership wasn’t the right choice for me—until now. At 31, I bought my first house, and in this episode I’m sharing everything I learned along the way: the emotional rollercoaster of finding “the one,” the financial surprises (like hidden $50,000 repairs), why I chose a mortgage over paying cash, and what finally made me change my mind after years of renting. Whether you’re saving for your first home, debating if renting still makes sense, or just curious about how a self-proclaimed renter became a homeowner, this is the honest truth about what it really takes to buy a house.
Here are my thoughts on the home-buying process:
Timing matters as much as money.
I could have bought a home years ago, but it would have meant long commutes, fewer career opportunities, and sacrificing the freedom I needed to grow my business. Buying only made sense when my life finally felt stable.
You’ll know when it’s the right house.
I had toured plenty of homes that were beautiful but didn’t feel like mine. When I walked into this one, I felt it instantly. That gut feeling—paired with being ready—was the confirmation I needed.
Buying a home isn’t just about list price.
When a sewer inspection came back with a potential $50,000 repair, it completely changed the negotiation. It taught me that buying a home isn’t just about the listing price—you have to plan for the unexpected.
How you fund your purchase depends on your circumstances.
As a multimillionaire, I had the option to buy outright, but keeping my cash liquid made more financial sense. Debt can be leveraged, and I wanted flexibility in case of a downturn.
Renting is still valid.
Even though I’m a homeowner now, I’ll never tell you renting is “throwing away money.” Renting gave me freedom and flexibility for years, and it might still be the best option depending on your season of life.
Having the right team is everything.
From my realtor who felt like a therapist to movers who packed and built my furniture, I learned that surrounding yourself with the right people makes a stressful process so much easier.
Notable quotes
“Buying is not unfortunately a right anymore—it is a privilege.”
“I am the first woman in my lineage to buy property solo—with no partner, no parent, no inheritance.”
“There is nothing wrong with renting. It doesn’t make you a bad person or a financial failure.”
Resources mentioned:
Gentle Giant moving company
1-800-442-6863
Chelsea Moon – Keller Williams
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Transcript:
Tori Dunlap:
I have infamously been the multi-millionaire who rents. There have been national articles written about this phenomenon. And I just bought a house.
All right. We knew this day would come eventually. Maybe I knew it. You might not have known it, but I did. And I have said for years that renting was a better decision for me than buying, but I just bought my first house at age 31. So I’m telling you everything about the home buying process, what made me decide to actually buy a home, all of the emotionality of the home buying process, how much things cost, everything that went into my decision. So if you are thinking about home buying, this is the episode for you. And also if you’re just sneaky and want to know why I changed my mind we’re talking about that. Okay. So first let’s talk about the, I’m a multi-millionaire who rents. So I became a multi-millionaire at 27. I went from a a hundred K net worth at 25, which was the impetus of starting Her First $100K, to being a millionaire and then a multi-millionaire at 27. Through that process, I’ve taught millions of other women how to be better with money. Obviously, our entire company and organization focuses on being better with money. One of the narratives I was fed over and over and over again is that you are not financially successful unless you are a homeowner. And specifically, the moment you can buy a house, you should buy a house.
Now, if you are new to the show, if you are watching on YouTube and you’ve never heard my story before, first of all, welcome. Hi. You can subscribe if you feel like it. Is that I almost bought a house when I was 22. I almost bought a condo an hour outside of Seattle because it was the only thing I could afford. And when I reflect on that decision, it was one of the best things I ever did. Backing out was one of the best things I ever did. And there’s more in that episode. I can direct you there. It’s in the show notes. But basically what it came down to was it did not fit the season of my life. If I would’ve purchased that home, I would’ve been spending every weekend with my parents. No thank you. Not when I was 23. I would have been living so far outside of where I worked that I would’ve been commuting in at least an hour and a half one way each day, which would’ve been exhausting and left me no room to hang out with my coworkers or to make friends in Seattle or to have a life where I got to go to the gym and take care of myself. And I also don’t think my business would be here in the same way.
I don’t think I would’ve had as much business success because the networking opportunities weren’t there. The feeling of a city would’ve been different. And so me backing out of that home buying decision at 22 was one of the best financial decisions I’ve ever made. And from then on, not only was I okay renting, I couldn’t afford anything else. I definitely couldn’t afford to be a homeowner in Seattle. I could not have afforded to even buy a condo in Seattle because I was making $55,000 a year and then $60,000 a year and got these incremental increases. And before we even go any further, I want to acknowledge that the only reason I was able to buy a house now is because I went from a hundred K, a 25 to multi-millions at 27. That’s the only reason. I have talked so much on this show. I have talked so much in my work about how homeownership this expectation of success for Americans, this American dream is no longer accessible for the vast majority of people. So not only did it not fit my lifestyle, but I was just like probably most of you watching, I couldn’t afford to buy where I wanted to live.
Even when that financially changed, it still did not fit the season of my life. When I was 27 and now had a little bit more money, maybe a lot a bit more money I was like I renting. At 27 I packed up all of my stuff in my one bedroom apartment, put it in storage, and traveled the world for nearly a year living out of Airbnbs. That would’ve been a lot harder if I was a homeowner. I would’ve had an additional mortgage plus that Airbnb cost. And even if I had one or $2 million in the bank, that’s still pretty expensive to pay double in mortgage. I was also writing a book that then became a New York Times bestseller. I was running a multi-million dollar company. I had a lot of other focuses besides homeownership.
I didn’t want to be weeding my yard. I didn’t want to be painting. I didn’t want to be worried about something exploding in the basement. I don’t know. I just didn’t want the hassle of homeownership. So what changed? Well, I started feeling more harmony in my life and the reason I use harmony and not balance is because balance is bullshit and doesn’t exist. But for the first time ever, I was writing in my journals last year that I felt like I had a good harmony between my life outside of work and my work. I had never experienced that before in my entire life. School always took precedent and then college always took precedent, and then my job always took precedent and then my company. Everything in my life revolved around work and I had to do a lot of work, I guess pun intended, to create a life for myself and relationships for myself and interesting things to do that did not have to do with work. And I got to the point as an entrepreneur where I could start saying no to opportunities that I didn’t want to do. Even they were “smart business decisions”. I got to have more of this understanding of where and when I liked to do work and liked to pour in my company and when I wanted to say no.
So first of all, my life just opened up. I think that comes with your Saturn return. I think that comes with turning 30. But the biggest impetus was that I got kicked out of my apartment. That’s what happened. My first solo apartment that I lived in Seattle, I lived in for three years. I loved it. It was 650 square feet. It was everything I needed at the time. I was in my mid 20s and I started Her First $100K out of that apartment. I lived during COVID in that apartment by myself, and I probably would’ve stayed in that apartment, but then my landlord decided to sell the condo. She decided to sell that apartment. That was the impetus of me packing up my stuff and saying, “Okay. I’m going to travel the world for a while and see what happens.” When I returned from that year of travel, it was June of 2022. I moved into a different place. Little bit bigger, had a designated home office. It was really nice. It was like, oh my gosh, I have all this space. It was a townhouse in Seattle. I would’ve stayed there but in January of this year, I got a call from my landlord and he told me that he was planning on selling the house. So I was right back where I started.
I had to ask myself, okay, do we want to find a new place to rent? Do we want to pack up all our stuff again and travel the world? The answer to both of those was no, because I was frankly sick of having somebody else decide where I was going to live every single year and I didn’t like that lack of stability. I was creating all of this stability in the rest of my life. I had been in my relationship for nearly three years at that point, the business was doing really well. Again, I was able to say no to certain opportunities and I was like, I want to be able to make a decision of when I leave, when I stay, and what I want my life to look like. And that’s when I went, okay, I think it’s time. I think it’s time to buy a house.
So when we come back from this word with our sponsors, I’m sharing the parts of the home buying process that shocked me the most, including the home I almost bought but didn’t and had an absolute conniption over and cried and why? We’ll be right back.
So I’ve decided I think I want to be a homeowner. Was this an overnight decision? Kind of. I’m going to be honest with you. Kind of. I think I was ready. I had done all the emotional prep work where I was like, okay, I think I’m at the point in my life where I want a garden to tend to and want some home projects and want to make a space my own and don’t want somebody deciding how long I get to stay. Again, I know the privilege in that. Most people don’t get to decide when and how they live or how long they get to stay. I know. But I was at the freedom point to say, “Okay. I think I’m ready to do this.” Let’s talk about the timeline here. So I knew in January that my landlord was planning on selling my house. My lease was not up until the end of June. He told me that if I found a different place to stay earlier, we could figure that out and he could put it in the market sooner. But I was planning on staying until the end of June because I just didn’t want to hassle with moving out sooner.
So a couple of months went by just normal, and I just had it in the back of my head. And then around March or April, I think it was like, okay, we’re going to do this. It’s about time. Let’s go. I connected with a friend of mine whose partner is a real estate agent and his incredible team. We had talked actually many years prior about buying a house because about every year he got a phone call from me where I was like, “I think I’m interested and I think I’m ready.” I was not ready. And he was very kind enough to walk me through the process, but never up to going and looking at houses. I think I looked at one house and considered buying it, but got a total feeling of dread every time I walked in there, and that’s how I knew it wasn’t my house.
So he was so patient with me. He and his team were so patient with me, and finally I called him and I knew. I was like, “Okay. I’m ready.” And the reason I knew I was ready is because I had tempted myself with the idea of buying a house, and every time I thought about it and actually got into the process, I was like, “Nope. I hate it. I don’t have the focus that this needs right now.” Because my focus was on other things. My focus was on building the business. So I knew I was ready.
So I called him and he lives in Bend, Oregon. He came up for two days and along with his incredible … I was going to say sidekick but business partner Chelsea these two realtors showed me around some houses. Now here’s the first lesson I have for you. If you’re thinking about buying a home, what you think you want is different than what you actually like. Okay. I knew I had a couple must-have things, okay. I wanted a bathtub. I’m a big bather. I love them. I knew that I needed a bathtub or at least a way to put a bathtub in the house. I also knew that I wanted a house with some charm, but I didn’t want it to be a fixer-upper. I knew I had some time, but I was not prepared to take on a vast home improvement project. The other thing that I wanted was the ability for us to continue running Her First $100K out of my house. So definitely in a dedicated office space and potentially some really, really nice areas for when our team was here to be able to host them. So I knew those were three basic things I wanted.
In these two days, as we start looking, they take me to these really nice modern built homes. These are brand new in the past five years. They were built from the ground up in the past five years, and these are beautiful homes. These are waterfall countertops and beautiful fireplaces and crown molding and just lovely. But I had no feeling of excitement while I walked to them. I was like, “Okay. These are pretty.” But they felt like houses, not homes. Then I would go into the ones that had a ton of character, but were just quirky. I remember one of the houses I saw, it was two different dining setups and then a library next to the kitchen. In the kitchen basically. It was all one room and there was a lot … It was just a weird setup, but because it was an older house, it was built in the ’60s. And I was like, okay. Even that two days of looking informed me a ton about what I actually wanted compared to what I thought I wanted.
I realized I wanted a older house if possible, so I got some of that old school charm, but that had been renovated with those modern appliances, with the modern paint, with the modern touches. I didn’t want a fully modern house and I didn’t want a fully quirky house. So as we start looking, we’re probably in this, I don’t know, three or four days. I see this house in the neighborhood of Madrona. Now, if you’re not familiar with Seattle, Madrona is a beautiful neighborhood full of what I call Father of the Bride houses. If you’ve ever seen father of the Bride these houses. These are beautiful craftsmen and colonial houses. They’re not all as big as the Father of the Bride house, but they’re just like, they just feel like a house or a home. Not even a house, a home. They feel like, oh, there’s going to be tulips in the front yard and people are going to be walking their dogs and there’s going to be children on bikes running around the neighborhood. It feels like a idyllic neighborhood.
So I end up seeing this house on a Tuesday the week after we did our first round of home looking. So this is probably the sixth or seventh house I’ve seen, which is not a lot. And I walk into this house and I really like it, and for the first time I start having that feeling of, oh, I think this could be my house. And I’m going from room to room and the kitchen’s really beautiful and there’s some things I would change. I don’t like the backsplash on the kitchen or, oh, I don’t like this paint color, but for the most part I really like it. And I saw it I think at 11 A.M. or 12 noon, and it had just gone on the market earlier that morning. I know enough about Seattle real estate to know that this is going to be competitive. This house is beautiful. It has a porch swing. I don’t need to say anything else. This house is a porch swing.
And so I’m walking through this house and I’m like, “Oh gosh. Okay. Is this my house?” And I’m there with Chelsea who I’m going to continue talking about, and she did not pay me to do this. This is not a sponsored thing. Chelsea became my therapist through this whole process. If you need a realtor in Seattle, there is no one better to work with. This woman and I have become now friends. She was so great. She could anticipate what I wanted or what my thoughts were going to be about house before I even vocalized them. She was just so great and she never pressured me. She never was like, “You need to buy this house.” She just gave me honest advice and always mirrored back to me what I was thinking. And so I was like, “This is really nice. I think this is really great.”
But one of the biggest things I told her is that I really didn’t want to get into a bidding war. And I know that me saying that living in Seattle, one of the most competitive real estate markets in the country was a little crazy. I told her, if we can, I am not a person who wants to make big life decisions under a ton of pressure and also a competitive environment because even if I don’t necessarily feel like the house is mine, I was worried I might try to outbid somebody just for the thrill of the competition. So I was like, if we can avoid it, I would really like to not be in this back and forth bidding war. And then I saw this house and I was like, okay, oh boy. I got a call on the troops.
So I brought my partner with me. I brought Karina, who’s our COO. I FaceTime my mom and guided her throughout the house because we had gotten word … Now it’s Wednesday morning. We had gotten word that they were a bunch of other people interested and that they had just now decided they were doing what’s called an offer review where there was a designated time to look at all the offers and that was happening Friday morning. So now we’re on a ticking clock. Okay. So Wednesday goes by, I bring in my partner Karina on Thursday. They go through the house. They’re like, “Yeah, I think it’s good.” This is the time where my partner is not being very vocal. We end up having a conversation after where he is so sweet and he’s like, “This is your purchase. I don’t want to sway you.” And I’m like, “No, idiot, that’s literally what you’re here for. I want your opinion. I need your help. Give me your perspective. Give me your advice.” And it came time to decide are we putting an offer in or not? So in less than 72 hours on the sixth home I had ever saw, I had to decide if I wanted to buy this house.
Now, there was not a pre inspection, meaning that the homeowners had done a approved inspection before. It was now crunch time. It was end of day Thursday night. It was like 4:00 P.M. and I was trying to figure out, do I want to buy this house? Do I want to buy this house without an inspection? Absolutely not. And is there even going to be an inspector available to get out in that time? Chelsea moved mountains for me. She called every single inspector on her list, and if they didn’t know anybody or if they didn’t have anybody, they gave the 12 other people that they contract out to. She found somebody for me. I am at a Mexican restaurant with my partner. I probably take 15 phone calls that night from my mom, from Chelsea, my realtor, from my mom, again, from my partner’s father who is also a realtor. I am just trying to counsel a million different people on the biggest financial decision of my life. And that dear reader is how I know looking back that it was not the right decision for me. The fact that I am a very decisive person and was not decisive about this meant that this was not my house.
Now, I think I would’ve been very happy in this home. I think it would’ve been lovely, but it was the timeline that freaked me out. Specifically the pressure to have an offer in get the inspection, have everything go in basically 12 hours. But also, I didn’t know what I didn’t know at that point in the process. I didn’t feel like I had seen enough. I felt like I was going to marry the guy I went to prom with once. Now, people do that. They have great relationships. I did not feel like I could do that. I didn’t feel like I had dated around enough. So I went back and forth and back and forth, and I called off the inspection that night. I said, “You know what? I’m not going to do it.” And then 45 minutes later, I had the biggest feeling of regret I’ve ever had in my entire life. I don’t have a lot of regrets, no regrets, but truly I am not the person that regrets a lot of things. All things for me are learning moments, but truly authentically that’s how I feel about most things. That was like, oh, I fucked up and I woke up the next morning after I slept on it and I was like, “That was my house and I fucked it up, and there’s not going to be a better house out there, and what have I done?”
I felt that way for weeks, even as I saw other houses and I saw a ton of other houses that kept reminding me of like, oh, you had it really good. Oh, that prom date was really cute. That prom date treated you really well, and you’re gone on a ton of dates with guys who are just not great or just not right for you, or plain terrifying. I walked in a house, everybody … Oh, guys, this house. I walked in a house that I swear to God was haunted. It was terrifying. It had a devil doorbell and a grand piano on the balcony outside that was half broken down and two staircases on either side of the house that both went to the same place, but only one went downstairs. This house was haunted. And after I saw that house especially, I was like, oh, I’d done fucked up. I did it. I should have bought the house. I should have done it. And I felt that way for a really long time.
And Chelsea, this sweet angel she is kept going. It wasn’t your house. It wasn’t your house. It wasn’t yours, and we’re going to find you your house. However … And yes I’m going to take an ad break right here because suspense, the clock was ticking. It is now end of May, my lease ends at the end of June. I have not found a house yet. So when we come back, let’s talk about it.
All right. My lease is over at the end of June. I do not have a house. I do not know what I’m going to do. I’ve probably seen 30 ish houses at this point in a variety of different neighborhoods in Seattle. And they’re fine. Some of them are terrifying. Some of them are fine, but none of them are my house. And I am starting to feel the crunch time of this because I’m like, okay, closing takes a while. If I find the house that I love, if there’s a bidding war, if I need to go and make sure that I have enough money for this house, then we have to close on the house and then the sellers have to leave, and then I have to get in, and then I have to move all my stuff. It was getting to be a little stressful, but this is how the universe is so funny. Literally the day I decided, okay, I need to start looking at Airbnbs, I was like, I need to put myself in an Airbnb for a month or two while I continue looking so that I have a place to live. I have a place to continue running HFK. The very next day I saw my house. The very next day.
So this is just a normal showing. I meet up with Chelsea. I walk in this house. First of all, I see it from the outside. I’m like, oh, she’s really pretty. And the sellers are still inside. I get there a little bit early. I watch them because I’m voyeuristic in a non-creepy way. They are really sweet. They have a dog. We love when people have dogs and they leash up their dog and they go on a walk and they leave. And I’m like, okay. So I start walking up this house and Chelsea meets me at the door and I walk in and I’m like, “Oh, this is a really lovely house.” I walk into the kitchen, “Oh, this is a really lovely house, and it has green cabinets and it has a breakfast nook.”
Now, these are two things that I joked about with Chelsea from the beginning. I joked about how much I love Dakota Johnson’s kitchen with the green cabinets and how that could never happen, but maybe I could find a house with green cabinets [inaudible 00:25:04] or I could paint them green. And I had never actually told her that I secretly also wanted a breakfast nook because I didn’t think either of these things were necessarily realistic. And sometimes when a realtor hears, I want this thing, they won’t look at any other houses that aren’t that thing. I was willing to live without green cabinets and a breakfast nook. But lo and behold, this house has a breakfast nook and green cabinets.
And then I start walking into the rest of the house and out loud, I start going, “Oh, no. Oh no.” Into every room of the house I go, “Oh no.” And this oh no is really oh yes, but this oh no, is oh God, the other shoe hasn’t dropped because this was the other thing. And if you have even gone to open houses, because I did that when I couldn’t afford a house, I loved going into open houses. The first part of the house might be really lovely. The living room or the primary bedroom are lovely. And then you get down to the basement and you’re like, “A murder happened here.” You’re like, “No, thank you. This is awful. The rest of this house is not going to work.” And that’s what happened quite a bit is I started getting my hopes up. I would see, oh, the entryway is really lovely. Or, oh, the front yard is really great. And then I would go to the rest of the house and I was like, “Oh, the rest of this house is a let-down. It doesn’t match the rest of the …” I would get really bummed. This house was not that. Every room I walked into, I was like, “Oh my God, the other shoe hasn’t dropped yet. Holy shit.”
I start moving around to the other rooms. I go into the basement. I’ve seen a lot of basements during my months of searching that were depressing and dark. This is not depressing or dark. Holy shit. This is my house. Now remember I told you I’m a very decisive person, and I had told Chelsea this because again, this is therapy. She was like my therapist. I was like, “Here’s what I know about myself and here’s what I know to be true.” And after every home we looked at, I’d be like, “Here’s something new I’ve learned about myself.” I told her I’m a very decisive person. I know what I like and I can make a quick decision. The Madrona house was not a quick decision, even though they expected me to do that really quickly I was not ready and equipped to make a quick decision. I did not feel like that decision was right. And as I walked from room to room in this house, walked outside, walked around, walked to the neighborhood, I was like, “Yep. This is it. This is it. I don’t think I need to see anything else. This is it.”
And I had my parents come out. I didn’t really care what they thought. I knew this was my house. But I knew that my parents would do the classic mom and dad thing of like, whoa is the radiator and the hot water heater? When has that last been serviced? The stuff that you need your parents to do. And my partner saw it and actually gave me his opinion, which is that he thought this house was much more my house than the previous one and how he thought I could be really happy here, and I made an offer. I made an offer on the house. Now a huge asterisk came up in the process of this home buying. This specific house it had gone through a pre-inspection. I was comfortable because Chelsea, the gem that she is, had told me, “Hey, this pre-inspection is by a company I know and like and trust. I don’t think you need to do your own inspection.” So I was like, “Cool. Great.” But she’s like, “There has been no sewer inspection, so you should get a sewer inspection.” Did the sewer inspection.
As I’m ready to make an offer on this house, the sewer inspection comes back and it tells me that, Hey, everything’s fine but this is an older house. This house was built a long time ago and it had been completely renovated, so it had the old charm that I wanted … Beautiful wood floors and gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous molding and so much character but it had been completely renovated. Literally not one thing aesthetically I would change in this house, but the issue is with old pipes, they have not been lined. This is something that I did not know three months ago, and frankly I feel like such an adult and also so boring talking about. But they came back and they were like, “Hey, this is not lined, so it’s not a problem now, but it could be a problem in the future. And the pipes go all the way around the house in a very weird configuration and it’s going to cost you $50,000 to fix it.” Okay. So I’m like, “Oh boy. Okay.” Already expensive house. I planned on that, but I did not plan on the sewer thing.
And actually, classic me turned it into a really great opportunity because when I put an offer in on this house, I thought I was going to have a bunch of other people trying to fight me for this house. I was not only the only offer, but I was able to come in under asking in order to basically pay for what I knew the sewer replacement costs were going to be, and my offer was accepted. Do you know how rare that is in Seattle? Do you know how rare it is that I was the only person? I didn’t have a bidding war? I dreamt of not having a bidding war, and I got the house under asking and I got to put the sewer work on my credit card and get credit card points. It was incredible. It was incredible.
And I’ve been in this house now for a little while. I didn’t announce it when it first happened, mainly because of privacy, to be honest with you, but also because I wanted to actually feel what it was like to be a homeowner before I came on here and was like, here’s what I’ve learned about homeownership and I’m going to learn a lot every single day. I’ve already learned a ton about myself. I’ve learned a ton about the work I do or don’t want to do in a house. The upkeep it does require to be a homeowner. The fact that having money to buy a house, but also having money to pay other people to help me with the house is absolutely phenomenal. And again, such a privilege. And I also learned that this was exactly the right time for me. I made exactly the right decision at the right time. So not only is my house absolutely lovely, has a ton of character in the nicest neighborhood … People have literally brought over flowers and cards to welcome me to the neighborhood. They have invited me to dinner and drinks. They have checked in on my house when I’ve been away. It’s just been so lovely.
It’s going to make me cry. I feel so lucky to be able to wake up in a house that I earned that I worked really, really hard for. Again, not without privilege, but I am the first woman in my lineage to buy property solo, to buy property by herself with no outside help, no partner, no parent, no inheritance. I don’t know if any of my family has gotten substantial inheritances, but I have been the first woman in my lineage to do that. That feels pretty incredible. And again, it’s why we do the work that we do is I want women to have this feeling. I want women to … Whether it is buying a home or whatever other decision they want to make, financially have money, be the tool and the resource and the reason they’re able to do that, not the reason they can’t. And I just really love my house. I really love my house.
And everybody told me it’s a feeling that you get when you walk in, you feel that it’s yours, and I am such a gut impulse person that felt and seemed so right until that feeling was challenged until I was like, oh gosh, maybe this is it. I don’t know. What is this feeling supposed to feel like. It’s like, you know what love feels like in general, but you can’t really describe it until you feel it. That’s what this was. I had to feel it to understand that everybody was right. So let’s talk about some of the best things I did. The first one is I worked with a realtor. I think most people work with realtors. Again, this is not sponsored. I have to shamelessly plug Chelsea Moon. This woman is so incredible, was again, part therapist, part realtor to me was so kind, was so compassionate. If you need somebody in Seattle, this is your girl. If you need somebody in the Pacific Northwest, this is your girl and her team, they were just phenomenal. Tyler who I worked with, who introduced me to Chelsea, they’re just both incredible people and I believe they’re both with Keller Williams.
The second thing I did is I hired professional movers. I worked with a incredible moving company called Gentle Giant. This is a part where it is sponsored. In exchange for some social content and exchange for me, talking about them in the show, they were kind enough to help me with my entire move. But you know me, I’m not going to talk about something I don’t believe in. And also I would be shamelessly plugging them either way. Oh, guys, moving is the most stressful thing in the entire world. You know if you’ve done it. It’s awful. And packing is also the worst thing. The packing plus the moving. It’s terrible. It’s awful. These guys were so great. Okay. They were so nice. They came and they packed all of my stuff. I didn’t do any packing. They packed all of my stuff. They brought all of my stuff to my new house. They unpacked a good chunk of my stuff. They put furniture together, which is literally my least favorite job on the planet. Me and Ikea furniture, me and just putting furniture. I can’t stand it. I’m not good at it. I have no patience for it. I had these rocking lawn chairs that my Nana bought me that were still in the box because they didn’t fit in my previous house. They put them all together.
They were so kind. They were so caring with my stuff. They were just fantastic. It was a 12 out of 10 positive experience. If you have the money and if you’re able to make room in the budget to afford this, it paid for itself. They’re called Gentle Giant. They’re fantastic. They are nationwide, not just here in Seattle. I highly recommend them.
One of the other best things I is, I was flexible when it came to the amount of money I wanted to spend. I was originally going to try to buy this house all cash. Now that for a lot of people is not the financially responsible move. We have talked about this before on the show, but debt becomes leverage for rich people. Debt is negative if you’re poor, but it’s called leverage if you’re rich. And basically what this means is like Adele who’s worth … I don’t know, however many, hundreds of millions of dollars when she buys new property, she takes out a mortgage on that house even though she doesn’t have to, she can afford to buy that house cash. The reason she does that is because she doesn’t want to tie up her cash by using it all in a house. She can get a mortgage for a lower interest rate than she could be making somewhere else like the stock market. However, interest rates right now as of this recording are high. They’re at like six-ish percent, almost 7%. And so I was like, okay, I’m a multimillionaire. I’ll just buy this in cash.
Then I found this house. This house was more expensive than what I wanted to pay, and I was in the financial position to not just go over my budget, but to actually think differently about how I was going to afford this house at all. I didn’t want to tie up even more money in cash that I might need in case our business hits a rough patch, in case we go into another recession. Cash is king. I wanted my cash to be cash and not tied up .even if it meant I wasn’t paying a mortgage every month. I didn’t want a bunch of money not accessible to me anymore. So a game time, last minute decision that again, my lenders were so great with, Chelsea was so great with, I decided actually I’m going to take out a mortgage.
This is where I need you to understand that taking your credit score seriously is so important because if I did not have good credit, if I hadn’t worked on maintaining a good credit score for just on a normal Tuesday, I wouldn’t have had this option. A lot of people plan ahead. They can’t buy their house in cash. Most people can’t. Totally understandable. So they think about boosting their credit score in anticipation of getting that mortgage. That’s very smart. And also, if you can be maintaining your credit score on any random Tuesday, you have so many financial options available to you that somebody with a poorer credit score wouldn’t have. So I was able to walk in there and get a mortgage with my 750 plus credit score at the best rate possible because I had done all of the financial foundation and good housekeeping work now as opposed to scrambling to try to make it happen.
This is what a lot of people do. Oh, shit an emergency just happened. I’m going to scramble to figure out how to afford it instead of saving an emergency fund when things are good. Oh, shit. I have to go into a bunch of costly debt because I didn’t save that emergency fund or because I didn’t think through this financial decision. Oh, I have regret about this purchase because it wasn’t intentional. This is the power of taking your financial education seriously on any day, but especially on the most important days of your life or potentially the most stressful days of your life. So one of the best things I did was thinking about debt as leverage, thinking about debt and taking on debt as a responsible thing to do. And I’ve actually just realized this. I don’t know why it took me so long to realize this. I’m now a multimillionaire who has debt.
I haven’t had debt since 2020. I am now a multimillionaire who has debt again, and I’m not mad about it. It was the smart financial move because it meant that I wasn’t tying up my cash and it meant that I could refinance my mortgage later at a lower interest rate. And by me maintaining my credit score always I was even able to entertain that as a possibility. After the break, we’re going to talk about what I’d do differently next time as well as if my advice has changed and if it’s changed for those of you who are thinking about renting versus buying and what you might want to consider, if you’re currently on the fence. We’ll be right back.
All right. So has my advice changed? The multimillionaire who rents, she may be gone. Okay. But has my advice changed for you? Absolutely not. I will yet again say that buying is not unfortunately a right anymore, it is a privilege. With the average home price in Seattle being $900,000, there are very few things that exist right now as like starter homes that are accessible yet alone a normal house where you could have children or care for ailing family members or have a yard. And this is the reality for most American cities, is that it is pretty impossible to buy a house for the average millennial, the average Gen Z. it’s very, very difficult. If you are in the financial position to be able to buying a house my advice will never change. I think that you can achieve financial freedom … I achieved financial freedom, not owning a home. I think you can also achieve financial freedom owning a home. But ultimately, is it a financial decision? Yeah. It’s really more of an emotional decision. Does renting or buying fit the season in your life? For many, many years made the most sense to me. It was a luxury to rent in that way where I could call somebody up and have them fix it, have them take care of any problems that arose. I could focus my time and energy on other priorities.
If you are able to buy a house financially, first of all, congratulations. And second of all, do you want to? Do you actually want to be a homeowner or have you just been told that that’s the right thing to do? Or that renting is throwing away money? That’s not true. Neither of those things are true. Make sure they’re true to you. So let’s talk about if you might be ready to buy a home. So first thing is if again, you feel emotionally ready. Second thing is if you can afford it, and not just the mortgage, not just the monthly payment. This is the thing everybody misses is we’re talking about the monthly payment plus homeowners insurance, plus property taxes, plus maintenance, plus upkeep of the home if you’re not doing it yourself. There’s a lot of additional costs than that. You also might be ready to buy a home if this is something that helps you build the financial life that you want.
A lot of Americans primary asset is not their 401Ks, it’s their homes. A lot of people use their home as a financial asset if that is something that makes sense for you, great. And finally, when it comes to buying a home, and if you’re prepping to do this, make sure you have a really good team in place. Again, my realtor is fantastic. The lenders that she recommended were incredible. I had to get lawyers involved. My lawyers are fantastic. Thinking about the team that you’re going to put together that helps you buy this home is going to either guarantee you have a good time or a bad time. I have discussed this before, but when I was about to buy that condo at 22, I used my parents’ realtor and I can tell you … I’m not going to name him. He’s a bad realtor. He’s not great. He pressured me. He thought my requests were insane. He did not treat me with respect, did not actually understand or work to understand what I wanted. It was not a good time.
And ultimately, just like your financial advisor, just like anybody else, if you are working with them and if they’re working for you, make sure they’re working for you. Make sure that they’re vibing well with what you need and the support you need. Make sure that they’re not going to pressure you into making a decision just so they can get commission. That’s not the person you want to work with. And if you’re choosing to buy a home with someone else, whether that’s a partner, whether that’s with another couple, I’ve had friends in Seattle do that. It’s one couple buying a house with another couple. Make sure that you know what you’re getting into. Make sure that you are going into that partnership with Eyes Wide open and understanding whose name is on the deed. What does this actually look like?
In conclusion, buying a house ended up becoming the decision that was right for me during this season of my life. I am so happy I did it. I am so happy to continue learning and being a homeowner. And if you have any questions about homeownership or things I didn’t cover, we can definitely do a follow-up episode. Feel free to DM us on Instagram at Financial Feminist Podcast. You can comment down on YouTube or Spotify. But the thing I want to leave you with is that there is nothing wrong with renting. I’m always going to say that. It makes sense for so many people. In fact, it’s sometimes the only choice for so many people. Do not let anybody make you feel bad about it. You can do just as much financial good and have just as much financial success for yourself, for your family, for your community if you’re a renter, it doesn’t make you a bad person. It doesn’t mean that you are failing or not being a good financial person. I don’t know. It’s okay. It’s okay to rent.
Thank you so much financial feminists for being here. I am so excited to continue all of this process and continue updating you. Where it feels in line with my privacy. I’m excited to show you what my house looks like, what I’m doing with it, how I’m decorating it, how I’m harvesting my tomatoes from my garden because yes, there’s a garden and I’m just really, really thrilled. So thank you for your support. Yeah, just thank you for being here. Thank you for supporting us, listening to this show and allowing us to do this work.
Thank you for listening to Financial Feminist a Her First $100K podcast. For more information about Financial Feminist, Her First $100K, our guests and episode show notes, visit financialfeministpodcast.com. If you’re confused about your personal finances and you’re wondering where to start, go to herfirst100k.com/quiz for a free personalized money plan.
Financial Feminist is hosted by me, Tori Dunlap. Produced by Kristen Fields and Tamisha Grant. Research by Sarah Sciortino. Audio and video engineering by Alyssa Midcalf. Marketing and Operations by Karina Patel and Amanda Leffew. Special thanks to our team at Her First 100K, Kailyn Sprinkle, Masha Bakhmetyeva, Sasha Bonar, Rae Wong, Elizabeth McCumber, Daryl Ann Ingman, Shelby Duclos, Meghan Walker, and Jess Hawks. Promotional graphics by Mary Stratton, photography by Sarah Wolfe, and theme music by Jonah Cohen Sound. A huge thanks to the entire Her First 100K community for supporting our show.
Tori Dunlap
Tori Dunlap is an internationally-recognized money and career expert. After saving $100,000 at age 25, Tori quit her corporate job in marketing and founded Her First $100K to fight financial inequality by giving women actionable resources to better their money. She has helped over five million women negotiate salaries, pay off debt, build savings, and invest.
Tori’s work has been featured on Good Morning America, the New York Times, BBC, TIME, PEOPLE, CNN, New York Magazine, Forbes, CNBC, BuzzFeed, and more.
With a dedicated following of over 2.1 million on Instagram and 2.4 million on TikTok —and multiple instances of her story going viral—Tori’s unique take on financial advice has made her the go-to voice for ambitious millennial women. CNBC called Tori “the voice of financial confidence for women.”
An honors graduate of the University of Portland, Tori currently lives in Seattle, where she enjoys eating fried chicken, going to barre classes, and attempting to naturally work John Mulaney bits into conversation.
