If there’s one piece of info to take away from today’s guest, it’s that there’s no “perfect” moment to buy a home. It’s about timing your life, not the market.
In today’s episode, I sat down with repeat guest Daryl Fairweather –– Chief Economist at Redfin and author of Hate the Game: Economic Cheat Codes for Life, Love, and Work. We got into the real, updated math on buying a home in 2026: mortgage rates, whether prices have already peaked, the climate risk nobody’s pricing in correctly, and the creative paths (co-buying, ADUs, house hacking) more people are turning to because the old rules just don’t work anymore. If you’ve felt priced out, behind, or like homeownership might not be “in the cards” for you, this episode will change how you think about the whole decision.
Key takeaways
The system isn’t broken by accident
Daryl explains that local zoning rules, NIMBY-ism, and property tax policy are shaped by the people who already own homes and show up to city council meetings to protect what they have. There’s very little advocacy built into the system for renters or first-time buyers. Knowing this isn’t about giving up — it’s about understanding that struggling to afford a home isn’t a personal failure, it’s a structural one.
Two things can be true at once: housing is unaffordable, and we may be at the peak of that unaffordability
As baby boomers age out of their homes and Gen Z (a smaller generation than millennials) enters the market, supply is likely to increase while demand growth slows. Daryl expects this to moderate price growth over the next decade — not necessarily bring prices down, but slow the acceleration. Wages growing faster than home prices means affordability could genuinely improve, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now.
Climate change is quietly becoming the next housing affordability crisis
Insurance costs are climbing fast in Florida, Texas, the Gulf states, and California, and older homes weren’t built for today’s climate. Daryl’s advice: think hard about whether you’re willing to pay more — financially and in risk — to live somewhere with high disaster exposure, and prioritize homes in more climate-resilient areas when you can.
The 5-year rule still matters
Buying only starts to make financial sense once you’re planning to stay in a home for five or more years — that’s roughly how long it takes for the equity you build to outweigh the transaction costs of buying and selling. Daryl learned this the hard way with her own first home in San Diego, which she bought before she was ready to settle down and later sold at a loss when she realized she needed to move for her career.
Renting isn’t “throwing money away”
Homeownership forces savings through mortgage paydown. Renting doesn’t, so Daryl’s advice is to treat your own savings and retirement contributions as non-negotiable if you’re staying a renter, so you’re building wealth just as intentionally as a homeowner would.
Creative ownership models are becoming real, practical entry points
Single-family zoning laws are far more restrictive than people realize, but where ADUs (accessory dwelling units) have been legalized, they’re opening up new ways to afford a home: renting out a unit, housing aging parents, or giving adult kids independence without dorm fees. Teaming up with another household to co-buy can also mean more combined income for a loan and shared costs for insurance, maintenance, and even childcare.
Your credit score is one of the biggest levers you actually control
A better credit score means a better interest rate, which changes both your monthly payment and how much home you can qualify for. Paying down existing debt, opening a credit card if you have no credit history, and asking for a credit line increase (without using it) to lower your utilization are all concrete ways to improve your position before you ever talk to a lender.
The real mindset shift: stop timing the market, start timing your life
Daryl’s core advice is to buy when you’re ready to stay in a home for the long run — not when a headline says rates dropped or prices are about to rise. That timeline looks different for everyone, and it’s shifting later for more people, and that’s genuinely okay.
Notable quotes
“Being behind is not the same as being out.”
“It’s not about timing the market. It’s really about timing your life.”
“People tend to manage what they can measure. And the money in their bank account is something that’s really easy to measure. It’s a lot harder to measure how much enjoyment am I getting out of this decision, or how much peace does this decision bring me.”
Episode at-a-glance
00:00 Intro
01:06 Is it too late to buy a home?
03:00 What winning looks like when the system feels unwinnable
04:27 Smart next moves for stuck renters and would-be buyers
06:34 Why housing may get more affordable over the next decade
08:21 Climate change and the coming insurance crisis
11:22 When does buying actually make sense? (the 5-year rule)
14:53 How job stability and housing go hand in hand
17:05 Preparing to buy: talk to a lender early
19:58 Rethinking the 20% down payment
21:16 Creative paths to homeownership: co-buying, ADUs, house hacking
25:07 Starter home vs. waiting for the dream home
27:39 How housing costs will reshape households and family life
28:58 Will the housing market crash?
32:29 Misconceptions keeping people stuck
35:54 What to do if you’re priced out right now
37:24 The mindset shift: timing your life, not the market
Thanks to Rocket Money for sponsoring this episode!
Thanks to BetterHelp for sponsoring this episode!
Daryl’s Links:
Website
Hate the Game book
Daryl’s IG
Learn the exact strategies to save money, pay off debt, improve your money mindset, and increase your net worth. Get your personalized plan: https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod.
RESOURCES:
Looking for accountability and deeper financial education? Join the $100K Club
Our HYSA Partner Recommendation (terms apply)
Behind the Scenes and Extended Clips on Youtube
Leave Financial Feminist a Voicemail
Financial Feminist on Instagram
Take our FREE Money Personality Quiz
Meet Daryl
Daryl Fairweather is the chief economist of Redfin. Her insights have been featured on 60 Minutes, CBS Evening News, as well as in the New York Times and Washington Post. Fairweather is the author of Hate The Game from The University of Chicago Press. She is also a member of the advisory council of the Federal Reserve Bank of Dallas. Daryl received her Bachelor’s of Science from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and received her Ph.D. and Master’s degrees in economics at the University of Chicago where she specialized in behavioral economics.
Transcript:
Tori Dunlap:
My guest today told me something that stuck with me, people tend to manage what they can measure. And when it comes to buying a home in 2026, most of us were working with numbers and rules that are badly out of date. Record high mortgage rates have a lot of people frozen in place, staying in jobs in cities they’ve outgrown because moving simply costs too much. So today we’re going to determine can we actually afford a home in 2026 and beyond and if home-ownership is even what we want to do and how to prep financially for either decision. Today’s guest is Daryl Fairweather and she is a chief economist at Redfin, an MIT grad, a University of Chicago PhD in behavioral economics and author of Hate the Game.
We talked through what a smart move actually looks like right now, why home prices may have already peaked, how climate change and insurance are quietly reshaping where it makes sense to buy and the creative options more people are turning to. Co-buying with friends or family, ADUs, and zoning changes redefining what a home can actually be. There’s a real plan in here, so let’s get into it. But first, a word from our sponsors. I’m so excited to have you back on the show. A lot of people feel like they missed their chance to buy a home. From what you’re seeing right now, is that true?
Daryl Fairweather:
I mean, it’s true for some people that housing has gotten so unaffordable that they don’t have a way in financially right now. And that is real. Prices are at record highs and mortgage rates are more than double what they were during the pandemic. So the math is much harder to make work now. There’s still people out there buying homes, obviously. People who really see that as a priority in their life who don’t want to delay it, who understand that delaying it isn’t necessarily a better option either. But for a lot of first time home buyers especially, it’s just so much harder than it was during or before the pandemic.
Tori Dunlap:
I really appreciate the honesty because I do feel like I get the question a lot of like, “Can I still be a homeowner?” And I have a similar answer, which is unfortunately it’s not just about working hard and making good financial decisions. There are so many things that are making home-ownership expensive that have nothing to do with how hard you’re working. And you point out in the book that most games are designed by and for the winners. What does that mean when we’re looking at the housing market right now in the US?
Daryl Fairweather:
Well, the rules of how much housing gets developed and how easy that process is, it’s largely determined at the local level. And it’s existing homeowners who are voting in these local elections, who are showing up to local city council meetings and blocking housing from being developed. The phrase for it is NIMBY-ism. NIMBY stands for not in my backyard. And then you look at it even a broader level, the way that our taxes are designed, it benefits existing homeowners. There’s talk now on both the left and the right of freezing property taxes, which is a benefit to existing homeowners. There really isn’t a lot of advocacy for renters or first time home buyers to get them into that class of being a homeowner, but there are plenty of homeowners who are creating a system that really benefits them.
Tori Dunlap:
What does winning look like when the system itself just feels unwinnable?
Daryl Fairweather:
Well, I think you have to decide what your own values are. It’s a trade-off nowadays to decide if home-ownership is really right for you because there’s going to be sacrifice involved. And I think you have to personally decide what sacrifices you’re willing to make. So in Los Angeles, for example, 99% of homes for sale are unaffordable to somebody making the local median income. So for people who are middle class in Los Angeles, the choice is often, “Do I want to stay living in Los Angeles, but live as a renter or move somewhere else where housing is more affordable and attainable?” Then you have to give up living in the place that you’ve decided to live. And those trade-offs are really hard, but I think that if you can be okay with making that trade-off and know that it was the right decision for you, then that is winning regardless of whether you become a homeowner or don’t. It’s a choice that you’re making for your own benefit.
Tori Dunlap:
I appreciate that perspective because I do think that a lot of the folks I talk to are just like, “Well, it’s not going to happen for me in my city.” And so you then have to decide, “Okay, if you want to stay in your city, great. It just might not be in the cards for you because it is so expensive.” But if you really want to be a homeowner, the answer might be move somewhere else. So you’ve talked about how, of course, we might not be able to control the economic market, but you can control your next move. So what does a smart next move actually look like right now for renters or would be buyers who just feel stuck?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yes. If you decide to stay a renter, you’re living in a high cost of living city and you want to stay in that city, maybe you have determined that staying in that city is the best for your own lifestyle or the best for your career progression, that’s fine. If you’re going to stay a renter, it’s really important that you still set aside money for savings, for investments. Owning a home is a natural investment. It’s an automatic investment. Most people have a hard time saving, but if they’re paying off their mortgage, they’re automatically gaining equity at the same time. If you’re a renter, you need to take a portion of your income and put it into savings, either retirement savings or rainy day savings, probably both, so that you could be as financially secure as a homeowner. It just takes a bit more discipline. And then if you are deciding that you want to move to a different area, you do have to think about, is that going to limit your career opportunities?
Are you at a place in your career that you can make that work? Can you work remotely? If you lost your job, would there be other job opportunities available to you where you move because no job is necessarily forever? So it’s also a risk to make that move to a place that maybe doesn’t have as good of a job market. And also don’t get discouraged too much. Just because it’s not working out for you right now. If you decide that you want to prioritize your career and your earnings first and foremost, and you really go at that hard, 10 years from now, you may be earning a lot more money and home-ownership may become accessible to you. Also, 10 years from now, home-ownership will probably be more affordable because home prices are growing slower than wages and we think that trend is going to continue for the next 10 years. So make a decision for now. You don’t have to give up entirely. Lots of people are buying homes at later ages nowadays. It’s kind of the new norm.
Tori Dunlap:
That trend you just mentioned, can you tell me more about that? Because I do feel like there is this misconception of, “the market is never going to adjust and it’s going to be this expensive forever and I’m not going to be able to have this accessibility in my lifetime.” So talk to me more about that trend that you’re seeing. You said wages are looking to increase, but maybe housing is staying the same or not getting more expensive at the same rate.
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. Two things can be true at the same time. Housing is unaffordable. We are in an affordability crisis when it comes to housing. But at the same time, we’re probably at the peak of how bad that unaffordability is going to get, at least in terms of how much money you need in order to afford that purchase upfront. Over the next decade, baby boomers, they’re in retirement, they’re nearing the end of their lives. Those homes are going to be coming on the market, increasing the supply of housing. Gen Z is a small generation compared to millennials or baby boomers. So there’s not going to be a lot of people waiting to buy those homes. If the demand stabilizes and supply increases, then that should result in price moderation. Now, the way the housing market works, it probably won’t mean that prices necessarily go down, but it could mean that they stop going up or don’t go up as much as they have in the last decade.
And as people’s wages increase, that will increase affordability. Now, I said that this affordability is really about the entry price to owning a home because the next crisis that we’re going to have in housing, unfortunately, is going to be about insurance and really climate change and the cost of maintaining and owning that home. It’s probably going to get harder and we’re going to have some significant challenges there when we haven’t even fully solved the supply problem. Baby boomers retiring, giving up their homes. It’s going to help some, but it’s not going to be a perfect solution. And it’s still going to be a challenge for people to buy a home in the places that they most want to live in those high opportunity cities like Los Angeles, New York, the Bay Area. Just because baby boomers are selling their homes in Arizona and Florida doesn’t solve the housing crisis in coastal California or on the East Coast.
Tori Dunlap:
You just mentioned climate change, and I think that’s something that we just don’t talk about enough. I was lucky enough to get invited by TED to go to Costa Rica to do a whole trip talking about climate and the impact. And one of the things we discussed is, of course, in my work, we’re talking about personal finance and the financial impact of certain decisions. But you’re absolutely right that LA perfect example, the cost of buying a home and the cost of getting insurance, if they’ll even insure you at all, is now insane just because of what we know the impact of wildfires and other natural disasters are going to be because of climate change. So can we stay on that for a little bit? How are you seeing climate affect the housing market and affect the cost of buying a home?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. So home insurance is getting more expensive. We see this especially in Florida and Texas and those Gulf state areas that are prone to flooding and hurricanes. But you also see it in California. Now, California’s housing market, there’s more public intervention there. If you own a home and your insurer won’t insure you any more than you can get on this fair insurance plan so you can stay in your home longer, which sounds great, but what it also does is that it encourages people to stay in homes that have high disaster risk for longer than they might if they were getting that price signal from insurance. So it’s a really messy problem. I don’t really have clear solutions. There’s definitely going to be trade-offs that have to be made, but in general, the cost of insurance is going to go up. It’s either going to be local governments or state governments or maybe even national governments that are stepping in to help subsidize that insurance.
But at the same time, we need to be building more housing in the places that are naturally resilient. We don’t want to be building more housing out in the forest where there are wildfires or in wetlands where there’s flooding. We need to build housing in the core of cities that tend to be more resilient to climate change. And we also need to modernize older homes because homes are built for the year that in which they were built. If a home was built back in 1960, it was built for the climate in 1960 and the climate has changed a lot since then. And we have a very old stock of housing in this country, so we need to modernize housing too. But that’s going to be expensive when we already are behind when it comes to building housing.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. And I think that a lot of the things we’re talking about are not individual problems. They’re systemic problems that need to be fixed at the systemic level. But it is something helpful to know is that if you live in a place that is prone to some sort of specific climate disaster, that’s going to affect the price of that home. So you have to decide, “Am I not only willing to take that risk, but am I willing to pay more money or does it make sense to continue renting or even move to somewhere else?” We were talking before about that decision to continue renting, to buy in the place you’re at, or to try to buy somewhere else. Are there specific signals that someone should watch out for when they know a move makes sense, when they know they’re ready to go to that next phase in their life?
Daryl Fairweather:
Well, usually it makes sense to buy a home when you are ready to stay in that home for at least five years. That’s around the time that the math starts working out where the equity that you’re gaining in your home offsets the cost of transacting, like paying the fees associated with buying and selling homes. So you don’t want to buy a home and then sell it again in a year because you’re going to end up paying more money than if you just rented that same home and didn’t have to pay for that transaction. When you’re ready to settle down and put down roots, that is usually the moment that people decide to buy a home. It usually coincides with them starting a family or getting married or making these other decisions that require commitment. And the longer you stay in the home, typically the more equity you gain and the better off you are.
There are these rent versus buy calculators that you can run, but they’re always based on assumptions like, “What’s the increase in rent going to be? How much is your home going to be worth?” And those things are really hard to forecast. Right now it’s more affordable to rent than it is to buy. But when we have an economy where it’s more affordable to rent than it is to buy, more people rent, that increases demand for rents and then rents go up in the future. So usually I tell people, “Just ignore all that noise and really focus on, are you ready to settle down in this particular home, in this particular place?” And because the climate is changing, that part of that decision is like, “Well, am I ready to make this commitment for the long haul and update this home so it’s resilient to climate change and pay those insurance premiums? Or do I need to be more selective about which homes I buy and really pick those maybe more modern homes and more resilient areas and places where the government is doing something about climate change so you feel more protected?”
Tori Dunlap:
You write about selling your San Diego home and moving to Seattle, even though it felt like admitting you made a mistake. You’re an economist who understands sunk costs better than most, but what does that moment really teach you about the gap between knowing the right move and actually being able to make it?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. So the first time I bought a home, I didn’t follow my own advice. I bought a home before I was ready to settle down.
Tori Dunlap:
I think that’s really common for people. If you do have the flexibility to buy a home, a lot of the people I talk to, it’s like, “I bought too early because everybody was telling me to.” It was almost a mistake I made where I was going to buy in a place I didn’t want to live because my parents were like, “You need to not throw away money by renting.” So I feel that so much.
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. Yeah, definitely. I was getting pressure from my parents to buy a home. There was stuff going on in my family that kind of made it easier to buy a home than to rent, but it was the wrong decision. And the reason it was the wrong decision was because I wasn’t happy in my job. And San Diego is not a place where there are lots of jobs for economists. Economists have an easier time finding work in a place like Seattle or DC or New York because it is a niche job. So that was the mistake that I made. It’s not only did I not like my job and I probably should have dug deeper on that and understood that I was not going to stay there for very long and then realized, “Well, if I am not in this job, I’m probably going to have to move to find a better job.”
And that’s what I ended up doing. And it didn’t feel like I was admitting that I had made a mistake, but you have to admit that you make mistakes when you make mistakes. That’s kind of part of being an adult. And really what I needed to do was set myself up for the future because I couldn’t undo the past. So the only thing that should be weighing on me is what’s going to be the best choice for me moving forward. And it was moving to Seattle, taking a slight loss on the house and getting a job that was going to be better for me in the long run and set me up better in the long run than staying in a job that I didn’t like.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. I mean, we’re talking a lot about job stability and I think that’s really important because again, housing just feels like, “Am I buying or not?” But it is so much more nuanced when you consider there’s a lot of layoffs, there’s AI disrupting careers. How is specifically your job and your career goals factoring into your housing decision?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. I remember when I bought that house in San Diego telling my boss about that decision and he was so happy that I was buying a house because I think he was thinking in the back of his head, “Oh, now she’s stuck. Now I can mistreat her in this job even more so because I have this leverage over her.” And I think that that is an underrated thing is that when you lay down roots, it does mean that you don’t have as many choices going forward or those choices are going to be harder moving forward. They’re going to come with more costs because now you have to sell your house and take on those transaction fees in order to do it. And even if you’re moving across town for a better job, maybe your job is on the east side of town and you want to quit your job to move to the west side of town. Now you’re talking about a commute from this house that maybe you committed to because it was close to your job.
So I think that it becomes easier to make a choice to settle down when you are more established in your career, when you have a better understanding of what you would do next if you did lose your job and how that factors into you staying in that home. They go hand in hand, the job market and the housing market. We’re not seeing many people moving right now in the housing market because of how unaffordable it is and how many people are kind of stuck in their home because they have these record loan mortgage rates from the pandemic. And it mirrors what’s happening in the job market where we have this low, higher, low fire job market because a lot of times people are moving to get a new job, but if they feel stuck in their house, they’re not going to be quitting and seeking out a new opportunity, which is not only bad for those individuals. It can be bad for the economy if people are staying in jobs that they’re not the most productive in, where there could be a better opportunity for them that is more productive.
Tori Dunlap:
So let’s say someone wants to buy someday, but either they can’t right now or they don’t want to right now. What are the most impactful things they can do this year to prepare financially and strategically?
Daryl Fairweather:
It’s never too early to talk to a lender and understand what you would qualify for with your home and what kind of rate you would get. By the time you actually go and buy the home, some of those terms might change a little bit because mortgage rates can fluctuate. But still, I think talking to a lender early on can help you just get a grip on the process and make it feel less scary or less intimidating. And it just kind of answers those unanswered questions about, “Well, what could you qualify for? How much of a down payment do you need? What difference would the down payment make? Should you save more to get a bigger down payment so you can lower your monthly payment?” A lender can help you walk you through that. And then once you have an idea of what your budget could be and what you feel comfortable with, then you can go on a website like Redfin and look at what’s for sale and look at the homes that are within your range and start to think through like, “Which of these homes am I attracted to?”
“What are the trade-offs with these homes? Do I prefer a short commute or would I rather have a longer commute with a larger home?” Kind of explore different neighborhoods. And if you decide that you do need to save more in order to really be able to afford that home that you would want to stay in for longer, then you can start focusing on savings in order to get you to that place where you feel really confident that this is the home that is going to stick.
Tori Dunlap:
And I think one of the things you can do as well to really prep is making sure that your credit is in the best place possible, especially since I don’t think anybody is going to be buying a really expensive house in cash at this point. So can you walk me through how credit plays in to making sure that your mortgage rates are the most affordable they can be?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yes, your credit score will impact what interest rate a lender is willing to give you. And the higher the interest rate is, the more you end up paying over the life of that loan. It also impacts how much of a home you’ll be able to qualify for because if you have a higher interest rate, your payment’s going to be higher and your lender is going to be looking at that debt to income ratio to determine if that payment is sustainable for you. So the better your credit score is, the better positioned you will be to get the best possible deal on a mortgage loan. And there are things you can do to improve your credit score.
If you have outstanding debts, you can pay them off. If you have no credit at all, you can open up a credit card so you can have that history of having credit that gets you a better credit score. And actually nowadays they’re starting to incorporate more things into credit scores like your history of paying rent. So that’s another thing to ask your lender about, what actually goes into how they calculate what kind of interest rate you would qualify for and what other documents you might be able to provide to improve your credit ranking.
Tori Dunlap:
And one of the things we’ve talked about many times on this show for boosting your credit is asking for a credit line increase with your credit card and then just not using it because part of your credit score is your credit utilization. So if we can bring down that utilization, then that’ll help increase your score too. So we’re talking about down payments and the 20% down payment for so many people is just too fucking high. It’s just so expensive. So how do people think about down payments differently today, especially if that 20% traditional advice just feels completely out of reach?
Daryl Fairweather:
Sure. So if you do not have the money for a 20% down payment, there are low down payment options. There are first time home buyer programs that the government provides, local and federal government has down payment assistance. So you might be able to qualify for that assistance to get you that 20% mark. And you could also maybe qualify for FHA loans that have lower down payment requirements or if you’re a veteran, a VA loan. They do come with some fees. When it’s a private loan, it’s called private mortgage insurance. And I’m blanking on what it’s called for the government, but something similar, but it doesn’t cost as much. But there are these different loan options available. So it’s definitely something to ask a lender about and seek out a lender who’s very knowledgeable about those alternative loan programs. And also you can work with a real estate agent who has worked with first time home buyers before to get a better grip on what’s available in your local area and at a federal level.
Tori Dunlap:
One of the things I’ve seen, especially here in Seattle where homes are really expensive, is I’ve had friends who have co-bought homes. It’s two couples who, one’s living in the top floor, one’s living in the bottom floor. And I think we maybe even talked about this the first time that you were on the show. But how are people being creative or getting creative in purchasing houses, especially where the housing market is just so expensive in these major cities?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah, it’s so interesting because when we talk about single family zoning, so this is the idea that you can only have a single home on a plot of land. People think that’s what it’s about, is one home on a plot of land, but it’s actually even more restrictive than that. It literally means single family. You can’t have legally more than one family in a home that is zoned for a single family. They have rules about how many unrelated adults can be in the home. But we’re seeing a lot of updates to these zoning codes. And also a lot of these zoning codes aren’t actually enforced. Your neighbor would have to narc on you that you have this arrangement going on. But I think that’s just something to bring up because that’s just an example of how the housing system is set up to not make it work for people who are really trying to come up with creative solutions.
But there are some instances where people have figured out a way to make it work. They maybe are just below the limit of how many unrelated adults can live in a home together and it works for them. And this can be a great way to afford a home because you’re teaming up, you have more income to go towards that loan. And you also have somebody who’s around to help with those expenses of home-ownership, like helping to pay the insurance, helping to pay the utilities and the maintenance. And if you have a family, it can be a great way to team up on childcare because childcare is so expensive. It costs nearly as much as a mortgage in some of these cities. So I think that we really need to move away from this model of a single family and a single home because there are better models out there that are going to be more affordable, that are more community oriented, that can help people out right now when it’s so hard to own a home.
Tori Dunlap:
I’ve also seen so much house hacking of, “I buy the house and I rent out a room or I rent out the ADU in the back.” I have friends who Airbnb out in ADU or have sometimes even built the ADU that wasn’t there before. And that I think is helping so much in terms of, “Okay, can you cut your mortgage in half? Can you maybe even get your mortgage entirely paid for?” And that’s a creative way that you can still have a home while adapting to your financial circumstances.
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. I’m a big fan of ADUs. It’s really encouraging to see so many local governments legalize these additional dwelling units or backyard cottages, is sometimes what they’re called, because it opens up just so many different models of how to make home-ownership work. You can rent it out to a stranger and have income to help you afford the entire property. You can have your aging parents live there so that maybe they can help you with your kids and you help them with getting to doctor’s appointments. And you can have a system too where maybe if your kids are older, they’re at college and they live in the ADU, they still have some independence and they don’t have to pay for a dorm if they’re going to college locally. There’s just so many different opportunities that open up when we allow people to decide for themselves how are they going to make it work.
People will come up with creative solutions. I think we just need to get out of the way and stop making it so hard to build these ADUs because sometimes ADUs are legalized, but then there’s all of these little requirements. “Oh, it has to be this far away from the main house or this far away from your neighbor’s home.” Or, “It has to be only one story.” And then all of these regulations start to really limit the options for people. So I think we’d need to err on the side of letting people do what they want with their own homes. And maybe their neighbors aren’t going to like looking at it for a while, but they’ll get used to it and then they’ll forget that they had a different view of their neighbor’s house to begin with.
Tori Dunlap:
One of the things I was trying to navigate in my early 20s is I got to the point financially where I could afford to buy a condo in Seattle, but I could not afford to buy a house. And I remember trying to navigate, do I just buy the, “Starter home.” Or the cheaper home that was accessible to me, build some equity there, and then up level to more of my dream house? I obviously chose to wait, but I think that becomes a question for a lot of people of, “Do I just buy what I can afford or do I wait for the house I really want?” Do you have an opinion about that?
Daryl Fairweather:
I mean, I think it comes down to the reasons why you might want to buy a home versus rent, because when it comes to the trade-off between a one bedroom condo versus a one-bedroom apartment, it’s a very clear cut trade-off. It’s not apples to oranges, it’s more apples to apples. It’s going to be a very similar option for you. So the reasons that you might want to rent is because it offers you more flexibility. If you need to move, you can move. You don’t have to worry about what happens if your toilet breaks, calling somebody. You’ll have somebody there to help with that. The advantages I think of owning a condo is that you’ll never have to worry about your lease being up and having to move before you’re ready, especially if you’ve become attached to that home or area and you don’t want your landlord increasing your rent, or you don’t want your landlord literally terminating the lease and selling the property out from under you, then owning to prevent that.
Tori Dunlap:
Which happened to me twice. Yeah. And that’s one of the biggest reasons I chose to buy a house is I was like, “I’m tired of people telling me every three years, “Ah, we’re good. We’re selling the place.”” And I was like, “Okay, great.”
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. And that can be extremely disruptive. Moving is financially expensive and it’s just disruptive to your life to have to pack everything up and move somewhere new. So that kind of stability I think is a reason to own. Now, the thing about condos is that you’re not on your own. You’re living in a building where other people are going to be affecting you. You’re collectively going to be making choices about, “Do we update the pool on the building or do we pay for a new roof?” Or whatever it may be. You’re going to be charged HOA fees that could go up over time the same way you that your insurance, if you own a single family home, could go up over time. So you do have to relinquish, I think, a little bit more control when you are buying a home in a multifamily building, but you still get some of those benefits of home-ownership, like gaining equity and having more autonomy over when it’s time for you to move or if you so choose, you can stay there as long as you want.
Tori Dunlap:
You’ve predicted that high housing costs will reshape households. We were kind of talking about this already, but more roommates, more multi-generational living, fewer people even having children. Do you see this as a temporary adaptation or is this a more permanent shift in how we view adulthood, family life, our financial goals moving forward?
Daryl Fairweather:
I think this is going to be a long-term trend. The idea of a single family home in the suburb is a very 1950s, 1960s ideal. And maybe it made sense back then, but nowadays there’s just not enough homes in the places that people most want to live. And the only way out of that is to densify and to build homes closer together and to have more multifamily living situations. And I think that even living in a multifamily home, it changes your relationship to that home because your neighbors are closer to you, you’re going to be interacting with them more. And that will come with some tension, but it’ll also come with some opportunities to help your neighbors out and really form communities in these multifamily buildings. So I think that the structure of the home versus being in that single family home and being that nuclear family, I think that will naturally change as more people move into multifamily housing. They’re going to be thinking about the relationship to their neighbors differently just by virtue of being closer to their neighbors.
Tori Dunlap:
Whenever I tell somebody I’m a financial expert, somebody always wants to talk to me about when the housing market is going to crash. Are we going to see a housing market crash?
Daryl Fairweather:
I mean, there could be localized downturns. I wouldn’t call those crashes, maybe more corrections. For example, in Austin, home values went sky-high in 2022 when everybody was moving to Austin and there was all this hype around Austin, but then they came back down still above what they were pre-pandemic. So I wouldn’t really call it a crash. If you zoom out, it just looks like prices have been going up the whole time. But we do see these corrections in markets. Now, I think what’s going to happen nationally is that home prices start to slow down. They no longer go up faster than inflation or faster than wages because of the demographic changes and because housing has already gotten so unaffordable, it’s kind of just reached the peak in terms of how much home prices can really accelerate.
Now there are exceptions to that. In the Bay Area right now, home prices are on a tear because of all the AI money that’s flowing into the real estate market there. But nationally, I think home price growth is going to moderate. And what that means for people though is that this mentality of, “If I buy a home, I’m going to just become wealthy naturally.” It’s going to be a little bit more worse. You’ll still gain wealth because you’ll be paying down your mortgage, but you might not be gaining as much equity as baby boomers did or as homeowners did during the 2010s when home prices were on a tear.
But I think what that means for people is that you should really be buying a home because it’s the home that you want to live in. And if it’s the home that you want to live in and it’s not available for rent, then you have to buy it. If it’s available for rent or for own, then you have to do the math or do the calculation on, “How long am I going to be staying there? And does it make sense for me to own if I really want to stay there longer?” But I think it’s going to become less of a get rich quick scheme and hopefully become more personalized to each person. And that hopefully I think will allow people to really make choices based on what they like as opposed to making a choice based on gaming, how much their home is going to be worth 10 years from now.
Tori Dunlap:
That’s one of the things I talk about all the time is a lot of these decisions that feel like big financial decisions, the goal is to actually make them just, “Do you want to do the thing?” Not, “Is it the most optimized financially prudent decision?” Me buying my house was not financially prudent. It just wasn’t. I’m paying way more in my mortgage than I am or that I was renting, four times more. But I love my house. I’m very happy in my house. And so I think that that is the goal eventually for everybody is we want people to be able to make the decision that feels right for them, right for their family, right for their community, right for where they’re expecting to be in life rather than just, “Is this the most, again, optimized financial decision for me?”
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. I think people tend to manage what they can measure. And the money in their bank account is something that’s really easy to measure. It’s a lot harder to measure, “How much enjoyment am I getting out of this decision?” Or, “How much peace does this decision bring me?” That’s harder to quantify, but I think it’s really important to think through those different factors and be honest with yourself about what you really want because otherwise you’re just going to stay on this hedonic treadmill of chasing a number, chasing a retirement savings number or whatever it may be instead of building a life that you are actually enjoying in the moment.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. Using money as a tool. Are there misconceptions that people have about housing and housing affordability right now that are actively keeping them stuck?
Daryl Fairweather:
Existing homeowners, like older generations. I’m just going to talk about baby boomers, even though I know we’ve done a great baby boomers a lot. They’re mostly fine, but they fall into this trap of thinking that, “I bought a home and it was hard. And I hear that it’s hard for millennials and Gen Zers, but it’s supposed to be hard. Nobody helped me. Why should I go out of my way to help them?” Which just isn’t true. Baby boomers did get help buying homes. They had home loan programs that existed back then that were helping them. The government was helping to build homes back then. We prioritized home-ownership in a way that we don’t really prioritize it anymore. So I don’t think it’s true that they didn’t get any help. And then also nobody was actively stopping them from buying homes when they were trying to buy homes, which is true.
And it is them. They’re the problem in a lot of senses. They’re the ones saying no to housing getting built in their neighborhoods, whether it’s apartment buildings or multifamily buildings for owning. They’re the ones saying, “No, I don’t want my neighborhood to change.” Well, if you don’t plan for the future, it doesn’t make things stay the same. It actually just makes things get worse because you’re not confronting these real problems that are happening in our society. One example is baby boomers who live in retirement communities, they need workers, young workers to provide services, whether it’s healthcare services or waiters at their restaurants or whatever it may be. And they wonder why it’s so hard to hire people in these areas. And it’s because nobody can afford to live there in the first place. So I think they’re a bit blind to how this housing unaffordability does impact them even though they’re already homeowners, they feel like they’re set. Not building housing for future generations does end up making things less affordable for them in more covert ways.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. Well, we also existed in a time where one income was enough to afford life. Very stereotypically, we had a man working outside the home and a woman working inside the home, and that could provide a very comfortable life for you. That’s not the case anymore. When daycare is as much as a rent payment, sometimes more, that is not sustainable long term. And it’s definitely not going to allow people to purchase housing, let alone just trying to survive. And so it is such a more complicated financial picture than it was back in the ’60s, ’70s, even ’80s. I remember talking to my parents.
I grew up in the home that they still are in. And talking about that house, it was difficult for them to buy, but it’s not even comparable. You can do the calculations of what it would be in 2026 dollars and it’s like, “It’s not even comparable.” There is this understanding of like, “Yes, working hard is hard. Becoming financially stable is hard. It’s a different level of hard now because the rules have changed.” Everything’s more expensive and wages have not kept up. And so it’s so much more of a nuanced problem than it was back when boomers were buying.
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah, it’s definitely true. And even this idea we talked about before of you buy a home and you stay in it forever. Well, that works really well when you have a job that you’re staying in forever. It used to be that people would get an entry level job and stay at the company forever, have a pension that they retire on, and they didn’t have to make these trade-offs about like, “Well, what if I lose my job? What happens to my home then?” So I think things are more precarious and less accessible now than they were decades ago.
Tori Dunlap:
For someone who just feels totally priced out and discouraged, is there a next move you’d recommend that actually puts power back in their hands, even if home-ownership is years away?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yeah. I go back to that thing about where you choose to live definitely impacts your ability to afford a home. I mean, I’m not saying that everybody should go move to Oklahoma City, but if home-ownership is something that’s super important to you and you’re in a city that has not been building enough housing, then that explains the reason why you can’t own a home and you have to make that trade off if you want to stay there or if you don’t. Other advice that I would have is you have to look at those smaller housing options, whether it’s a condo or a town home and see if that-
Tori Dunlap:
Townhouse. Yep.
Daryl Fairweather:
… yeah, if that works for you, if that’s a more viable entry point, that you can explore these alternatives where you maybe team up with somebody to afford a home. You definitely want to have a rental agreement or an ownership agreement if you’re going to go down that road. And then the other thing too, which I think isn’t exactly related to housing, but is if you can’t afford a home right now, think about your career. Are you in a career that would allow you to earn enough money to be able to afford a home one day? Are you on a path to increasing your earnings to be able to afford that home? Because it’s also a choice is what type of job you want to take. And again, if you really value your career, even if it doesn’t earn the most money and because it brings you personal satisfaction, that’s a completely acceptable choice, but it does involve some trade-offs.
Tori Dunlap:
As we wrap up, if you can give listeners one mindset shift about housing that would make their financial lives easier over the next decade, what would that shift be?
Daryl Fairweather:
The mindset shift that I would encourage people to take on is it’s not about timing the market. It’s really about timing your life. You’re ready to buy a home when you’re able to afford the home that you would want to stay in for the long run. And for some people that happens in their late 20s, but increasingly it’s happening for people at a later age, and that’s perfectly okay. The dynamics of how people are approaching aging is changing. People are having kids later. There’s technology that allows people to have kids later, and that kind of changes the timeline.
People are facing difficulties in the entry level job market, but later on, you might be in a better position. And I know that there is so much pressure from the media about, “Oh, rates dropped. You better rush in and buy a home now.” Or, “You don’t buy in this area because values are going down, but maybe they’ll be going up later.” Or whatever it may be. There’s so much noise out there. But you know your own personal situation better than anyone else, and that information is way more important than what’s happening in markets.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. We want to stop following the trends and actually tune into what we want.
Daryl Fairweather:
Yes. Yes.
Tori Dunlap:
Thank you for coming back on the show. It’s always so good to talk to you. And I always appreciate the honesty with also the hope because both of those have to coexist when we talk, especially about housing. Plug away, my friend. Where can people find out more about the book and everything else you’re working on?
Daryl Fairweather:
Yes. The book is Hate the Game: Economic Cheat Codes for Life, Love, and Work. It’s available everywhere. And I’m also making videos for YouTube if you want to check me out there. I’m on all the social media platforms, so wherever you get your social media, you can probably find me.
Tori Dunlap:
Amazing. We’ll link it down below. Thanks for being here.
Daryl Fairweather:
Thank you.
Tori Dunlap:
Thank you for listening to Financial Feminists produced by Her First 100K. If you love this show and want to keep supporting feminist media, please subscribe or follow us on your preferred podcasting platform or on YouTube. Your support helps us continue to bring this content to you for free. If you’re looking for resources, tools, and education, including all of the resources mentioned in this episode, head to herfirst100k.com/ffpod.
Thank you as always for being here, Financial Feminist. We can’t wait to see you in our free investing workshop. Again, that’s at herfirsthundredk.com/secrets. We’re talking about all of the secrets of the stock market, debunking all of the myths to make you a successful investor. So we’ll see you in our Secrets workshop soon. Thanks for being here. Thanks for supporting Feminist Media, and we’ll see you soon. Bye.
Thank you for listening to Financial Feminist, a Her First Hundred K podcast.
For more information about Financial Feminist, Her First Hundred K, our guests and episode show notes, visit financialfeministpodcast.com.
If you’re confused about your personal finances and you’re wondering where to start, go to herfirsthundredk.com/quiz for a free personalized money plan. Financial Feminist is hosted by me, Tori Dunlap, produced by Kristen Fields and Tamisha Grant, research by Sarah Shortino, audio and video Engineering by Alyssa Midcalf, marketing and operations by Carina Patel and Amanda Lefue. Special thanks to our team at Her First Hundred K. Kalen Sprinkle, Masha Bakhmikieva, Sasha Bonar, Ray Wong, Elizabeth McCumber, Daryl Ann Ingman, Shelby Duclos, Megan Walker, and Jess Hawks. Promotional graphics by Mary Stratton, photography by Sarah Wolf, and theme music by Jonah Cohen Sound. A huge thanks to the entire Her First Hundred $100K community for supporting our show.
Tori Dunlap:
Thank you for listening to Financial Feminists, produced by Her First $100K. If you love the show and want to keep supporting feminist media, please subscribe or follow us on your preferred podcasting platform or on YouTube. Your support helps us continue to bring this content to you for free. If you’re looking for resources, tools, and education, including all of the resources mentioned in this episode, head to http://herfirst100k.com/ffpod.
Financial Feminist is hosted by me, Tori Dunlap. Produced by Kristen Fields and Tamisha Grant. Research by Sarah Sciortino. Audio and video engineering by Alyssa Midcalf. Marketing and Operations by Karina Patel and Amanda Leffew. Special thanks to our team at Her First 100K, Kailyn Sprinkle, Masha Bakhmetyeva, Sasha Bonar, Rae Wong, Elizabeth McCumber, Daryl Ann Ingman, Shelby Duclos, Meghan Walker, and Jess Hawks. Promotional graphics by Mary Stratton, photography by Sarah Wolfe, and theme music by Jonah Cohen Sound. A huge thanks to the entire Her First 100K community for supporting our show.
Tori Dunlap
Tori Dunlap is an internationally-recognized money and career expert. After saving $100,000 at age 25, Tori quit her corporate job in marketing and founded Her First $100K to fight financial inequality by giving women actionable resources to better their money. She has helped over five million women negotiate salaries, pay off debt, build savings, and invest.
Tori’s work has been featured on Good Morning America, the New York Times, BBC, TIME, PEOPLE, CNN, New York Magazine, Forbes, CNBC, BuzzFeed, and more.
With a dedicated following of over 2.1 million on Instagram and 2.4 million on TikTok —and multiple instances of her story going viral—Tori’s unique take on financial advice has made her the go-to voice for ambitious millennial women. CNBC called Tori “the voice of financial confidence for women.”
An honors graduate of the University of Portland, Tori currently lives in Seattle, where she enjoys eating fried chicken, going to barre classes, and attempting to naturally work John Mulaney bits into conversation.
