What if you never had to choose between building wealth and honoring where you came from?
Bricia Lopez didn’t –– and she built something incredible because of it. She grew up translating for her immigrant parents, learned money by watching her family create and lose and rebuild, and went on to become a restaurateur, cookbook author, and the woman behind one of LA’s most iconic Oaxacan restaurants, Guelaguetza. Today she’s sharing everything, the mindset, the hard lessons, the margarita vs. martini moment that changed how she thinks about her own worth. Come for the food, stay for the money talk.
Key takeaways:
Money is something you can create
Bricia’s earliest and most powerful money lesson wasn’t about saving or budgeting. It was the radical idea, absorbed from watching her entrepreneurial father, that money isn’t something you just go find at a job — it’s something you create. Growing up in a family where her father sold mezcal and her mother kept careful tabs on money, Bricia internalized that wealth is generated, not just earned. For anyone building something from scratch, this reframe is foundational. You don’t have to fit into an existing system to build wealth. You can make your own path.
Running your own race is a financial strategy, not just a mindset
When Bricia realized she was benchmarking her restaurant’s success against businesses operating in a completely different cultural and market context, it was a wake-up call. What works for someone else’s brand, price point, or audience may actively work against yours. This applies whether you’re a restaurateur, a freelancer, a nonprofit worker, or a salaried employee. Knowing and owning your lane is how you stop leaving money on the table trying to compete in a race that was never designed for you.
Knowing your worth & charging it is an act of cultural resistance
Bricia is direct: the reason people hesitate to pay premium prices for Mexican food is racism. But she goes deeper than that, tracing it back to how immigrant and Latino communities have been conditioned to accept less, take what they can get, and be grateful for it. Her father didn’t even put prices on his menu when he opened, he waited for customers to tell him what they’d pay. That conditioning doesn’t stay at the restaurant door; it shows up in salary negotiations, in how we price our services, in how long we stay in underpaying jobs. Building wealth without leaving your culture behind means refusing to accept the devaluation of your labor, your craft, and your worth.
Your friend group is either an asset or a liability
Bricia is unapologetic about this: if your friends won’t talk openly about money with you — how much they make, how they invest, what’s working, what’s not — they’re not the community you need to build wealth. She co-founded Regarding Her, a nonprofit of 300+ women in the food industry, specifically to create a space where women share margins, losses, legal headaches, and wins without shame. Surrounding yourself with people who talk about money openly is one of the most practical and underrated wealth-building tools there is.
Wealth is not just a number
When asked how she defines wealth, Bricia doesn’t name a dollar amount. She describes it as having complete agency. The absence of those constant, low-grade voices whispering that everything could be gone tomorrow. For her, growing up watching her parents lose everything twice, those voices are real and familiar. True wealth, she says, includes your health, your relationships, your freedom to keep growing, and the ability to make decisions for yourself that aren’t dictated by financial fear..
When women are financially free, the world changes
Bricia has watched women stay in marriages they didn’t want to be in because they couldn’t afford to leave. She’s seen that story start and end more times than she can count. Financial freedom isn’t just about personal wealth, it’s about having the power to make decisions for yourself on your own terms. And when women have that power, the world changes.
Notable quotes
“I am a margarita running in a martini race, and I can’t do that. I have to run my own race.”
“If you don’t got girlfriends that share with you their income, how they live their life, how they invest, and how they grow their money, they’re not your friends.”
“It’s powerful when you feel safe in money. It’s powerful and I think that the more women feel that power, the world will change for the better.”
Episode at-a-glance
00:00 Intro
00:20 The First Money Lesson: You Can Just Make It
02:57 Being the Family Translator & Business Partner at 12
05:25 Redefining Success at Every Decade
09:08 Cutting Personal Comfort, Not Quality, During Hard Times
16:58 Why Bricia Talks Money Openly With Her Friends
17:22 The Margarita vs. Martini — Running Your Own Race
25:52 Why Customers Hesitate to Pay for Quality Mexican Food
26:37 The Importance of Knowing Your Worth
38:47 How Wealth Is More Than a Number
29:00 Building Something Meaningful Without Abandoning Your Roots
31:09 When Women Are Financially Free, the World Changes
32:38 Rapid Fire: Best Dish to Order, Desert Island Ingredients & More
38:58 Where to Find Bricia & What’s Coming Next
Thanks to Rocket Money for sponsoring this episode!
Bricia’s Links:
Website: https://www.ilovemicheladas.com/
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Meet Bricia
Bricia Lopez is a chef, entrepreneur, and acclaimed author. She is a partner at Guelaguetza Restaurant, recipient of The James Beard American Classics award and lauded by the late L.A. Times food critic Jonathan Gold as “The best Oaxacan restaurant in the United States.” Bricia has authored two cookbooks. “OAXACA Home Cooking From the Heart of Mexico” became an instant Amazon bestseller and earned a 2020 James Beard nomination. Her second cookbook, “Asada,” published in 2023, was included in the New York Times’ list of best cookbooks of the year. In collaboration with her siblings, Bricia has launched two nationally distributed brands, including the bottled cocktail mix, I Love MicheladasTM️ , and GuelaguetzaTM️ mole starters. A sought-after featured guest, Bricia has appeared on NBC’s Today Show and judged Bravo’s Top Chef, while also being featured in high-profile outlets such as Forbes, NPR, Food & Wine, BBC, and The New Yorker.
Transcript:
Tori Dunlap:
You’re afraid of success? Because you don’t want to leave your old life behind. Because for so many people, especially women and members of other marginalized communities, success often comes with an unspoken expectation. Leave parts of yourself behind to be taken seriously. My guest today grew her family’s restaurant and learned that money can be created and also disappear just as fast. She’s a chef, restaurateur, and author who spent her career challenging why some labor is undervalued, why certain cultures are expected to be affordable, and why success is so often defined by someone else’s rules. In this conversation, we talk about money and identity, what it means to honor your culture and your family while pursuing bigger goals, how to cultivate friendships and supportive partners where you can be open about your money and ambition, and why real wealth isn’t just about income. It’s about agency, values, and choice.
Today’s guest is Bricia Lopez. She is a chef, entrepreneur, and cultural steward, and the co-owner of Guelaguetza, the James Beard Award-winning Oaxacan restaurant, Jonathan Gold called, “The best Oaxacan restaurant in the United States.” She’s the author of two acclaimed cookbooks and is the central figure in bringing mezcal and Oaxacan specificity into the US mainstream. Let’s get into it.
But first, a word from our sponsors. So you grew up inside your family’s restaurant from a very young age. What was the earliest money lessons you learned even if no one explicitly talked about money?
Bricia Lopez:
Man, what were the first… Is this my therapy session that I need before my…
Tori Dunlap:
Potentially, if you wanted to be.
Bricia Lopez:
What are the lessons that I learned early on about money? I learned early on that you could just make money, that you could just make it, that you don’t really have to go to a job. You can just make it.
Tori Dunlap:
When you say make money, was it-
Bricia Lopez:
That you can just bring money in. You can just create it. You don’t really have to go somewhere every day, have a quote, unquote, job that you can just kind of go and create and then money comes.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. I think most people don’t have that view of money. So for you, was that the daughter of immigrant experience? Was that the entrepreneurial experience? Most women we talk to do not think that positively about making and earning money.
Bricia Lopez:
Yeah. I mean, there’s many things about money. I think that’s just the first thing that came to mind when you were talking about. My father has always been a merchant, entrepreneur, whatever you want to call it. My mom was always at home with him, supporting him. My mom always had a little notebook, which is funny because I also have a little notebook everywhere I go, and she would keep tabs of their money. And my mom also came from parents, grandparents who had stores in their little town. We weren’t of means by any chance. We grew up in Oaxaca. My parents came from a small little town in Oaxaca, Mitla and Matatlan. We weren’t financially literate, right, but I understood that my parents was just… My dad sold mezcal. He was a mezcal maker and he used to sell mezcal, but girl, this is way back before people were drinking mezcal in Brooklyn, New York. This is just way, way back.
When I was in my late teens, early 20s, my parents went bankrupt. So then I also saw my parents just lose everything, I mean, everything, their home, their cars. My car got repossessed. So I just remember that feeling of, “Oh, you can make it, but it can also be gone like that.” And I saw my father lose everything twice. At the same time that I realized that you could go and create it and you can just go and make it, I also learned very early on, or maybe not early enough, that you need to take care of it and have it grow for you and work for you and you not work for it. And that’s sort of the journey where I’m on right now.
Tori Dunlap:
Well, and you had a very typical immigrant experience, I think, especially you were the translator, you were the accountant, you were sometimes the decision maker when you were a child. So how does that kind of responsibility shape your relationship to work and wealth when you’re doing all of those responsibilities as a kid?
Bricia Lopez:
Yeah, my parents moved here to LA when I was about 10 years old. None of us knew how to speak English. So by the time I was 12 years old, I was pretty proficient in English, 12, 13. And by the time I was 15, I was the family’s attorney. My sister, my brother and I, my parents would just take us everywhere and we would translate everything they needed. My parents always sort of brought us in almost as if we were business partners in a sense. We were all working together, but everything was shared openly, how everything was going, what needed to be done, who needed to get let go. We were always included in those conversations. Not like that we had a say but everything was just talked about. There was no blur between home and the restaurant.
And also you’re in a restaurant and the restaurant industry is very specific. You have to create a movie every single day. You have to create an event every single day. Every single day is a new production and nothing can go wrong, because if one thing goes wrong, it’s all word of mouth. So if you have one client leave with a bad experience, it’s so bad for business. It’s such a grueling industry but teaches you so much about resilience.
Tori Dunlap:
I’ve never heard it phrased like that, it is a production every single day.
Bricia Lopez:
Oh, yes.
Tori Dunlap:
And you’re exactly right where I loved hearing food described as it’s the only thing that achieves all five senses or works all five senses. It’s one of the only experiences where sense of smell, sense of taste, sense of touch. Yeah, it’s all there but also your added pressure as a restaurateur where you’re exactly right, it is like everything has to go well and if something doesn’t go well, the ripple effect of that could be so costly.
Bricia Lopez:
And you have to manage an entire crew, everything from production to lighting to plumbing. You can have the most great day and all of a sudden your plumbing goes off, and then what happens? Or your heater breaks or your AC goes off or there’s a leak in the roof. I mean, I can go on and on about the industry, but it teaches you a lot. And I think that people who are in the industry who do very well in it is because it’s people who are just out there every single day who are doing what they love.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. Was there a moment that you realized your definition of success might look different than what you saw growing up or at least what mainstream culture celebrates as success?
Bricia Lopez:
I think if I’m going to be completely honest with you, I think I’m just learning to be even right now to choose what is that. I think it just changes as you grow. As you enter a new decade in life, you start sort of re-managing what success is. I think success looked very different to me in my 30s than it did in my 20s and that it does now that I’m 40. But I think I’ve always felt like I’m very… I’m not successful, but I’ve felt like I was following a deeper purpose, if that makes any sense. But I do think that at some point I thought that success had to be defined in a certain way. And I think today I see success as just peace, which is very different than the success my parents saw. And now that my parents are older, they’re retired, they live a great life in Oaxaca, I see their life as a huge success. It’s a huge success.
They have four children who are very close-knit, their legacy is still alive and they live a very peaceful life in their beautiful home in Oaxaca. Every day they get up, my mom feeds her chickens, they eat great food. I mean, talk about success. They eat incredibly well every day. My mom goes to the market every single day. She grabs incredible quality produce better than we get sometimes. She farms her chickens. She knows exactly what she’s eating. I mean, she breathes fresh air every single day and knits. I think that’s success.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. We’ve had a lot of conversations on this show with ambitious women who have to redefine what success looks like for them. And you mentioned this industry and as someone who has dated people who worked in this industry, who has friends who work in this industry, who has so much respect for chefs, I do think that the industry tells you success is Michelin stars and Beard awards and reviews at The New York Times and just going up and up and up and up and up.
Bricia Lopez:
Those are nice though. Those are all nice.
Tori Dunlap:
Oh, of course. Of course. But at a certain point, I think you’re right that we are all, especially as women, trying to figure out what success actually means, separate from the accomplishments and the accolades. Success can be those things, absolutely. But also, if you are achieving all of that but you’re getting to the end of the day and you’re not very happy with your life, then do you feel successful?
Bricia Lopez:
Yeah, then that’s not success. That’s just you living for someone else’s approval. Whatever your values are, I think success is living by your values, whatever those are.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah, absolutely.
Bricia Lopez:
Because there’s certain people who really value those things, and that could be their success. And if they value them, then amazing, but there’s certain people who value other things more. So I think your success is living truly in your values every single day.
Tori Dunlap:
I love what Bricia just said about success is living your values every day, and values are something I talk about a lot here on the podcast. And in fact, one of my main financial tenants is value-based spending, aligning your spending with your own values. But it’s really hard to do if you don’t actually have a plan at all for where your money’s going. So if you’re someone who struggles to figure out your spending, whether it’s not knowing how to track or where your money is going, I built a challenge just for you. The savings sprint gives you one small doable task every day to build real momentum and to see your progress fast. You can go to herfirst100k.com/ffpod to join this savings sprint. It’s completely free. And in less than a week, you can find extra cash hidden in your budget. You can automate your savings so you actually build wealth and you can finally feel in control of your money. So wanted to step in here really quick, give you this free resource, herfirst100k.com/ffpod, use it to transform your savings. All right, back to the episode.
We in our research found out that during the recession, your family made a choice to cut personal comfort instead of cutting their food quality at the restaurant, and that was a huge leap of faith but also incredibly strategic. Can you talk to me about that decision or what went into it?
Bricia Lopez:
The restaurant’s been around for over 30 years, right? It is wild. She’s old. In restaurant years, she’s over a hundred. It is a long time, but I think that there’s something to be said about legacy, tradition and culture that by definition just cannot be replaced because it’s so embedded somewhere. It has just such deep roots. So for us, it’s just always remembering that like, why do we do this? Because when you do something that’s so challenging every day and so taxing on your body, and really the margins aren’t great in restaurants, everybody knows that now, right, you’re really doing it for your values, like I said. So it’s like, what do we value? We value community, we value quality. My job, I’ve always thought of it as not just preserving my culture but really championing it and respecting in a way, because if I respect it, then others will respect it. So I means that I need to push my best foot forward. If I produce something, it’s got to be the best because that’s what we deserve and that’s what we should be accustomed to.
I’m just trying to set the standards higher for the next generations. Then they have just a higher set of standards. So when they go and they ask for something, they know what to expect and say like, “Oh no, I’m used to better.” So I think for us, it’s just always been that and that’s always been our North Star. And everything we do from producing our monthly festivals to every single day at the restaurant, except on Mondays, it is really to push our best foot forward for our culture and how we can do that. And it’s just quality. The other day, I invited a group of friends for brunch at my restaurant. They were talking about how great the chilaquiles were and like, “Oh my God, the chilaquiles are so great. How are they not soggy?” And they were just going on and on and on.
You read about all these techniques and how to get the chilaquiles soggy and not and this and that. And I’m like, “I’m going to tell you guys the truth. You know why? Because those tortillas that you see right there were made in Oaxaca by a very specific group of women using a very specific group of corn. They were flown all the way to Los Angeles so you could have them.” That really is why they taste so good. There’s just no other way of going around it. And we do that because we really care.
Tori Dunlap:
There’s a running joke on this show that all I do is cry and you got me already. No, that’s why I love food because it immediately helps you understand somebody’s culture.
Bricia Lopez:
It makes you respect them.
Tori Dunlap:
Yes. And when somebody like you is so passionate about it of like, “Yeah, we’re going to fly our tortillas in and that’s what’s going to make UP great,” I just fucking love that shit. It just makes me so happy. It’s so good. It’s so good.
Bricia Lopez:
Thank you. Thank you. It’s also great to know that people appreciate it because it does go unnoticed every single day. I mean, we sell tons of chilaquiles. No one really understands and that’s why it’s just so important. And thank you for having me on the podcast. I think it’s just so important to retell the stories over and over again because the only way that our culture’s going to continue to be pushed forward is through us. It’s us. It’s the people in the kitchen. Just give people great food.
One of the things that really sort of blew my mind, I think I can say this in this podcast, is this story. I had this realization, come to Jesus moments when I realized I am a margarita running in a martini race and I can’t do that. I have to run my own race. I was at a conference, Cherry Bombe Conference. Cherry Bombe, for those of you who don’t know, it’s a wonderful magazine. Women-owned, women-led, they highlight women in the industry. I love that magazine. So they had a great, beautiful event in LA. I was privileged enough to be in a panel with other great women. And I met this woman who runs a restaurant group here in Los Angeles.
She has six restaurants and I’m a huge fan because I only have one. And to meet someone who has six successful ones and who runs this shit and does her thing, I’m always about meeting women like that and be like, “Tell me everything. What do you do? What’s working? What’s not? What are your profits like? What are your margins? Are you up? Are you down?” So we’re always exchanging information with each other. So I was explaining to her we were 20% down this year, this was last year, which is actually great because the industry was down 75. So I felt like I was kind of winning.
Tori Dunlap:
Wow.
Bricia Lopez:
But she was telling me that she was up 15, and I believed it because I had been to her places. So that’s a 35% swing. That’s like crazy. So I was like, “But what are you doing? What is happening? What is the thing?” And she was saying she’s strategizing. And she said, “Oh my God, Bricia, you know what’s really hit? It’s like this $10 martini. People just really come for $10 martini because in their mind it’s just cheap, it’s great, and then they stay and then blah, blah, blah.” I’m like, “Okay, cool.” And then I started thinking, “Oh, well, that’s just happy hour stuff. That’s okay. Okay, but why is yours hitting so differently?” And then I realized, oh my God, I know why because the perception that this culture today has of a martini is $35. Somehow the martini has been able to present herself as a $35 drink.
Well, [inaudible 00:16:23] the margarita, poor margarita comes here. She’s made out of the most wonderful juice, come from the gods, an actual god came from heaven, stroked down with Mayahuel and out came the agave, like an actual goddess, okay? She’s an actual goddess, like facts. If I try to put a $10 margarita on the menu as a special, people are going to be like, “No, if it’s a special, give me a $5 margarita.” People’s perception of a margarita is not $35. And I was like, “Holy.” I had this whole coming to Jesus’ moment and I was like, “I have to run my own reins. I have to carve my own path. I have to run faster.” I can’t. It’s crazy that a martini made out of potato. Okay. She’s just vodka. She’s called vodka. Look, nothing against a martini. I love a martini, okay?
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah, but it’s not the same level of craft. Absolutely not.
Bricia Lopez:
It’s not the same level of craft. It’s not just tequila but lime juice. You know how expensive lime juice? Do you have place of lime [inaudible 00:17:30]? Go buy limes to the market.
Tori Dunlap:
What your story tells me and is also the perfect transition to my next question. Anybody listening, chef or not, there’s two things there that I think are really powerful. One, that you have a group of women who will talk openly about money with each other.
Bricia Lopez:
Oh, yes.
Tori Dunlap:
Because most people won’t, and that will talk about margins and talk about wins and losses and talk about all of that. But also too that you’ve realized what worked for her will not work for me and what worked for her restaurant or her niche or her situation might not be relevant for me. It might be, I might be able to learn or I might go, “You know what? I run a different business.” And my next question was going to be, why do you think that customers are willing to pay premium prices for certain things but hesitate when it comes to Mexican food, other than the obvious, which is racism? What would you say to someone who generally doesn’t understand why quality Mexican food shouldn’t be cheap?
Bricia Lopez:
Yeah. Well, let’s take the first part of the question because I think that’s an important one.
Tori Dunlap:
Absolutely.
Bricia Lopez:
I think it’s very important that if you, girlie, are listening out there, if you don’t got girlfriends that share with you their income, how they live their life, how they invest and how they grow their money, they’re not your friends. Friends will make sure that you’re taken care of. Friends will give you the truth. Friends will be like, “Listen, girl, this is how much I’m make, this is how much I spend. This is the way I manage my budget. This is what I’m investing in.”
Tori Dunlap:
You and I are going to get along. We love it.
Bricia Lopez:
I read this article. I had a crypto chain in my WhatsApp group with some girlfriends back in the day who were like, “You girls,” I’m like, “I don’t know anything about it.” Educating each other. This is what you need. One of my best friends, she wrote [inaudible 00:19:16] Warrior. She wrote a book about finances. And in her book, she was talking about how she’s the one who brought me into knowing about how to invest. She was the girlfriend in the group. Her and my other girlfriend Patty would always in a group chat. And she was the one who first told me, “Bricia, you got to buy your first Netflix stock.” She’s the one who pushed me into buying my first Netflix stock that I still have years ago. So I think it’s just very, very important that you all are very open with your friends.
And if you don’t feel comfortable with certain friends, then join some sort of networking group that will put you in a place where you feel safe talking about money. So the group that we are in, I co-founded this nonprofit called Regarding HER, where it’s made up of… I think we’re over 300 members now, all in the industry. I could be wrong, it’s probably more, all in the food industry, all women. We have monthly Zoom calls. We talk about where we are, where are you, what’s working for you, what’s not working for you? This is the issues that I’m having. “I got sued this week, so did I. This guy’s charging me this much. Hey, give me the contact. Oh my God, yesterday this happened. My sales are down 10. My sales are up 20. My lunch is going up. My lunch is going down.” All of these things.
How are you supposed to grow without information? You need to be around. That’s why I love asking questions. If all of my friends probably, if anyone listens, listening who knows me, they’re going to be like, “Oh yeah, Bricia asks all the questions.”
Tori Dunlap:
No, but that’s what you want. And that’s why we’ve created our communities and our programs and the community we have because as important it is I think to talk about money with the people in your life, for somebody who’s never done that, that may feel really intimidating. And it’s actually easier to talk to a stranger or someone who you’re just connected to more as an acquaintance than someone who is your best friend or your partner or your parent. And so I love that you’re doing that too.
Bricia Lopez:
Well, you’re kind of like a money therapist, Tori. Call Tori. Tell her all your issues.
Tori Dunlap:
I’m not qualified. I have to say legally, I am not a therapist. I am not licensed as a therapist but also yes. We talk a lot about the emotions of money, which I think are actually most of this battle. People think it’s about numbers, it’s not.
Bricia Lopez:
Your Instagram post, this pin at the top that’s just like the lessons. And I was like, they were all hitting hard. I was like, “Yes. Yes, yes, yes,” because it’s emotions. And it’s like the not facing it, the not looking at it, I was like, “Yeah, that is the thing.” Because I’m guilty of it too now too. I mean, there’s certain [inaudible 00:21:55] just like, “Oh, I’m not ready to look at this right now.” But you should.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah, totally. Okay. So I do have to ask you, with that martini versus margarita example, why do you think that’s happening? Why do people hesitate to spend more money on Mexican food?
Bricia Lopez:
Where they would be okay having a latte at Starbucks for $7, but then if I have a $7 horchata, it’s like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Why are you charging $7 for an horchata?” I have many thoughts. You said it. I think people are just racist. It’s just racism.
Tori Dunlap:
Absolutely.
Bricia Lopez:
Right. I think that for a very long time, my community has been conditioned to just be okay and take whatever it’s giving to us and be thankful. I think that when my father opened his restaurant, our restaurant the first day, he didn’t put prices on the menu. He waited for people to come and tell him how much they would pay for it. And then he was like, “Cool, five, three, four.” And that just tells me, “Oh yeah, you just take what you can get.” And our community has always just taken what we could get. We’ve never been in a place where we feel safe, secure, confident, valuable, where we can say, “No, I’m actually going to need more.” And I think this is a new generation and I think that this generation is now pausing and saying, “No, I’m actually going to ask for more now.” Yes, sure. I’m a $15 margarita but maybe I’m a $45 paloma, baby. Who knows?
Tori Dunlap:
Well, we live in a country where we associate Mexican labor generally with this is cheap or this is easy to find. The classic thing of this country was built on free or stolen labor.
Bricia Lopez:
Yes.
Tori Dunlap:
And so of course then that trickles into every aspect of the culture’ that trickles into food where you expect, “Oh, I’m going to a taco truck and I’m paying $4.” So all Mexican food should be like that when of course that’s not realistic.
Bricia Lopez:
What happens also, Mexico has a huge street food culture, huge and it’s delicious and it’s great. And everyone should go to Mexico and do a taco crawl. Everyone should go to Oaxaca and eat from the streets. It’s like you should. Yes. However, I think that when people then transfer that experience to a different country, yeah, but you’re no longer in Mexico. Sure. A clayuda on the streets and Oaxaca is this. Awesome. Then why don’t you book your flight and go get one. But if you want it here, this is how much it is. That’s just what it is. And I think that again, for a long time, a lot of people, especially a lot of smaller businesses who are just opening up, who are trying to figure it out, will just take what they can get and end up working themselves in a negative. I have seen many restaurants fail and fall into the same pattern of, yes, yes, yes, but then they’re just not even making money.
They’re slaves to their own business. They’re not even really having a real life. They would be better off working a 9:00 to 5:00, but they just love it so much and they’re there for the love and the passion and I see it, but they’re just not making financially sound decisions that are not just affecting themselves, but they’re affecting a lot more people.
Tori Dunlap:
It’s another thing where anybody listening, this is applicable to you, especially if you work at a nonprofit. We talk about that a lot on the show of this belief of like, “Oh, I do mission focused work, so therefore I shouldn’t be making a lot of money or it’s okay if I’m underpaid.” And it’s like, “No, no, we need you compensated fairly to do this really, really important work in our society.” And the vast majority of people listening to this show are women. We are often undercompensated because our labor is not worth as much, and I’m putting that in air quotes, but that’s what we’re struggling against this whole time as the devaluation of labor.
Bricia Lopez:
Yeah. I also think that personally, in my experience and knowing a lot of women, I think that we, for some reason, have a harder… I’ve had a hard time expressing my needs.
Tori Dunlap:
Yes. Absolutely.
Bricia Lopez:
I have a hard time saying what I want out loud to people who I care about because I’m afraid of hurting someone’s feelings. And I think that translates into work where maybe I will not have the difficult conversation with someone who needs to have a conversation, what needs to get let go. Right. Before it would take me longer, now I can have those better. I think same thing happens. And then relationships, stayed longer than we should have because I was so afraid of voicing what I actually wanted. So just these little things that maybe we think are so small, not looking at your financials because you’re afraid. All these little things we kind of put off. And I think personally, I may not say it myself. I don’t know if my brother’s this way, I don’t know if male friends, I feel like men have an easier way of just not just saying how they feel, but sometimes telling you how you should feel.
Tori Dunlap:
I think one of the things that is so interesting about talking with you about money is that perception or that belief, which I think is so important that I can make money, I can figure it out. How do you personally define wealth now and how has that definition changed since you were younger?
Bricia Lopez:
Well, I think if you really think about wealth, I think it’s having just complete agency, but I think wealth expands beyond financial burden. But the thing is just like the financial burden is only just one part. There’s so many other parts. I think that wealth encompasses being able to take care of your health. I think if real wealth comes from having the freedom, having this sense of lightness around your everyday life, waking up and just feeling light, being able to… This lack of worry, right? I think so many of us would live every day on just tingling worries of like, “This could happen and that could happen.” And these little voices, almost like KPop Demon Hunters like that, that are just sort of around you all the time. Just sort of telling you just like, “This could be gone soon.” I think that’s one of the little voices I have because of what I saw with my parents and what they went through, right?
And sometimes the little voices can just really inhibit decisions because you’re scared. So I think just when you kind of reach this point of wealth, there’s this point where you don’t really have these voices. Because I think that at that moment, I don’t think there’s a number. It’s just a feeling of just being just lighter and everyday worries. But that includes your health, right? That includes how you move. That includes your relationships. That includes who you’re sharing things with. That includes who’s coming over today. That includes wealth and friendships and wealth and just everyone around you and communication, wealth and communication with other people. And I think really in having great food and knowing and learning and just having the ability to keep growing. When you get older and you pile responsibility on yourself, children, businesses, it does get more challenging for you to grow as an individual because in order for you to grow as an individual, time is required.
Time is required to learn any skill if you want to just pick up a new hobby. Yesterday I had the realization that I have been wanting to learn how to ice skate for the past 30 years, and I have never learned how to ice skate. And it just sort of dawned. I’m like, “What?” And then I thought, “Man.”
Tori Dunlap:
And you can do that.
Bricia Lopez:
I can do that, but it’s a little more challenging for me because I have to rearrange schedules. It’s a lot more challenging for me to find time. It would’ve been way easier as a 20-year-old, right, when I didn’t have children, when I was just living… Maybe I should have skipped a couple of those dinners, a couple of those bar hopping accessories that I used to do with my girlfriends and maybe learn how to ice skate, right? But I think also it’s never too late. And I think wealth allows space and time for you to grow as an individual.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. For listeners who want to build something meaningful, whether that’s a business, a career, a legacy, but feel torn between honoring their roots and also wanting more, what advice do you have for them?
Bricia Lopez:
They’re torn between honoring their roots and wanting more. Why are they torn between those two? I think you can do both.
Tori Dunlap:
And that’s a great answer.
Bricia Lopez:
Yeah. I think that the way that you honor roots goes in anything that you do. I think that you can do anything. You can be in any business and eyewear industry, right? You can be in the eyewear industry. You can still honor your roots by that. There’s ways that you can bring your truth to anything. You can create a diaper brand and have your culture and roots be embedded in that. You can create a podcast. You can create a line of toys. You could do anything in this world. You genuinely can go out and create anything. I’ve never felt like I’ve lived in a moment where anything is possible. I don’t remember having this feeling when I left high school. I felt like it was just really hard to do things. And I think now there’s no excuse. You can learn any language. You have the world at your fingertips. You have every resource at your fingertips to create anything today. The world is falling apart, but I think there’s so much hope and you can still create a lot for yourself.
Tori Dunlap:
I mean, I feel the same way. There’s a lot of horrible things happening. And also, I don’t think it’s been a better time to build something for yourself, especially if you’re a woman, if you’re a woman of color, if you’re a member of a marginalized group where the situation you’re currently in, whether that’s your career or your lifestyle is not working for you, you have a bunch of resources and so many opportunities to change that in a way that we didn’t before.
Bricia Lopez:
Yeah. And I really believe that when you give women the power, they can change the world. I think one of the ways that women are going to be able to do that is for them to be financially free. When women are financially free, the world is going to change. Women are going to make just different decisions for themselves because they’re just financially free. I did it for myself. I’ve been witnessed of women staying in marriages just because they feel they can’t afford it. And it breaks my heart that that is the thing that’s keeping them in a situation that’s not allowing them to grow. And I have seen these stories repeat themselves. I’ve seen the beginning of that story, I have seen the end of that story many times in my life. So I think that maybe that is a lesson I learned early on about money.
And maybe now that we’re wrapping the episode up, I’m realizing that is the lesson. It’s like I learned the importance of being financially free. I learned about the importance of the power you gain when you are able to make decisions for yourself that are not based on money, that you’re able to move if you want to. You don’t have to worry about food, that you can drive yourself somewhere, that you can have a shelter that you can feel safe. It’s powerful when you feel safe and money. It’s powerful. And I think that the more women feel that power, the world will change for better.
Tori Dunlap:
Bricia, that’s my entire thesis statement. So I love it. Okay. I got to do some rapid fire with you before we go. Okay. A dish someone needs to order at Guelaguetza for the first time.
Bricia Lopez:
Guelaguetza.
Tori Dunlap:
Guelaguetza. Shoot. I knew this was going to happen. We can keep this in here. Okay. Say it for me one more time for me.
Bricia Lopez:
Guelaguetza.
Tori Dunlap:
Guelaguetza. Okay. I’m saying as the most white person ever who does not speak Spanish. Guelaguetza. Okay.
Bricia Lopez:
No, no, no. I always have people reminded us like, “You got to get some like Guelaguetza.” That’s how people have to remember.
Tori Dunlap:
That’s great. Guelaguetza. Okay. First dish someone’s got to order.
Bricia Lopez:
Chile rellenos. Chicken.
Tori Dunlap:
Tell me what that is.
Bricia Lopez:
One chicken and one cheese. Chile rellenos are, I think, one of the most misunderstood dishes, I think, especially here in California, another piss at the country. Chile rellenos here in America have been portrayed as just this soggy, oily, battered chile with stuff with cheese inside that’s just gooey and weird. But chile rellenos from Oaxaca are the best. We actually fly our chilies from Oaxaca. They’re very specific.
Tori Dunlap:
Of course you do.
Bricia Lopez:
They’re called chiles de agua. They’re called chiles de agua. It’s delicious. We stuff them with this chicken picadillo and the ones that we stuff with cheese, we put [inaudible 00:35:36] inside and they’re served over with this red sauce. It’s the best chile relleno you’ll ever have. Have it with-
Tori Dunlap:
That’s [inaudible 00:35:43].
Bricia Lopez:
… beans and a handmade tortilla.
Tori Dunlap:
Okay. That’s what I’m getting. That sounds great. Okay. The best Oaxacan dish you’ve ever had.
Bricia Lopez:
I mean, my mom’s.
Tori Dunlap:
Not your own restaurant?
Bricia Lopez:
No, my mom’s. Yeah. Yesterday’s? No. No. My mom makes this frijol en pata, which is a black bean stew with pig trotters in there. So pork feet black bean soup.
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah.
Bricia Lopez:
And it’s my favorite dish that my mom makes. Or salsa de carne frita. Those two are just iconic. I would have those anytime, any day. Yes, pork. Pork all day.
Tori Dunlap:
I need to go get after that.
Bricia Lopez:
If you’re kosher, you’d be not-
Tori Dunlap:
It’s not happening.
Bricia Lopez:
It’s not happening for you.
Tori Dunlap:
Not happening.
Bricia Lopez:
You’re not getting a full experience.
Tori Dunlap:
The ingredients you take on a deserted island, let’s say three.
Bricia Lopez:
Wait, wait, is salt ingredient? Well, I’m in the sea, right? I can just get something in the ocean.
Tori Dunlap:
[inaudible 00:36:39].
Bricia Lopez:
Okay. But [inaudible 00:36:42] salt pepper we have. Do we have vinegar? Do we have oil?
Tori Dunlap:
I don’t think we do.
Bricia Lopez:
Well, I would have to take vinegar, oil.
Tori Dunlap:
Like red wine vinegar?
Bricia Lopez:
I need ingredients. I’m like, I need beans. What do you mean?
Tori Dunlap:
Yeah. Probably chicken. You need chicken or pork?
Bricia Lopez:
Is there water?
Tori Dunlap:
Any. Just wild pig, guinea, boar.
Bricia Lopez:
No, I would rather…
Tori Dunlap:
You’re doing the Dwight Schrute thing where you’re like, “Okay, is there water on the island? I need iodine. I need the matches.”
Bricia Lopez:
I know. I know. Okay. I would say at deserted island, I would do a turkey or a chicken, maybe a turkey or a chicken because I could like… Wait, am I killing this chicken? It’s just like I’m bringing ingredients.
Tori Dunlap:
You are thinking about this way too hard, girl.
Bricia Lopez:
Also, my son does like to watch Survivor. That’s his favorite show, my son.
Tori Dunlap:
It’s great. It’s great.
Bricia Lopez:
I watch Survivor with him. So I think also, when you say deserted island ingredients, my mind just goes somewhere else.
Tori Dunlap:
And then they occasionally get chickens for their rewards, but then they can never, ever, ever keep them in the cage, and they’re always chasing after the chickens. That’s half of the show, I think. It’s just chasing after chickens on the island.
Bricia Lopez:
But also because my grandma kills chickens on the regular. I kill chickens. I’m very comfortable killing chickens. No problem. So I always think if I’m in Survivor, I’d be like, “Guys, what’s wrong with you guys?”
Tori Dunlap:
Hand me the chicken. Here we go. Hand me the chicken, hand me the machete.
Bricia Lopez:
I wouldn’t care. Okay. I mean, beans, I think beans, because I could never live without beans. For my protein, oh my goodness. This is really hard because I love all kinds of proteins, but if I’m going to stick with the beans, I need to have tasajo. Tasajo is just like my thing. I got to come with my tasajo. The beans though are really spicy because I’m not going to bring chiles with me, so my beans have to be spicy. And tortillas. What else am I going to have? The tortillas, some beans and beef. I’m good.
Tori Dunlap:
I mean, [inaudible 00:38:39] pretty. Yeah. Favorite late night meal?
Bricia Lopez:
A quesadilla.
Tori Dunlap:
A meal you’ll never forget.
Bricia Lopez:
A meal I will never forget. So many meals that I’ve had this past couple of years that I never forget, to be honest, that I think… You know what? I think the meal that I will never, ever, ever forget, and it was the best time we ever had, it was my entire family when I meet my parents, my siblings, our significant others, my ex-husband at the time. I had just opened Mama Rabbit, which was the first mezcal cocktail bar to ever open in Vegas. I helped open. I was one of the leads and creative lead and all things there. And they had us for the opening. It was amazing. I was hosting it. It was great. And then José Andrés invited us to his restaurant for dinner that night and reserved this private room for us and hosted my parents and my family.
Oh, I want to cry. It was so beautiful. He just made us feel so special and he made us feel so valued. And the entire staff came out. There was so much staff from Oaxaca that were there. They were just so happy to have us. His chef gave us… That’s when he gave us gin and tonics and we had tons of gin and tonics. We had tons of wine. Oh my God, we’re drinking so much wine, so much gin and tonics. And he curated the most epic dinner. And I think I loved it so much, not just because obviously, I mean, if José Andrés curates you a dinner, it’s going to be amazing. But I think it was more about seeing my parents just have that experience in Vegas and all my siblings there and my family and it was just beautiful. I’ll never forget that one.
Tori Dunlap:
Food brings people together. I love it. Thank you, chef, for being here. Plug away, my friend. Tell us what you got going on.
Bricia Lopez:
Oh my goodness. You can always order my cookbooks. I have two cookbooks. I have Oaxaca and Asada. So if [inaudible 00:40:40] up for the summer, you have to get a copy of [inaudible 00:40:42] cookbook, you can always get those two. I have my third one coming up next year, which hopefully I’ll be back in this podcast to promote. But I would say plug in, ilovemicheladas.com. We are launching our new [inaudible 00:40:54] flavor and I am so excited to have her join just out into the world. It’s like a first project that’s very much so food related because the michelada mix, but it’s very different than restaurants. And it’s the first product that we’re really, really, really, really putting all our effort into it or that [inaudible 00:41:11] flavor. And I’m so excited. And our monthly festivals, if you’re in LA, please come to our monthly festivals. There are tons of fun. You should come, Tori. Put your botas on and let’s dance some banda.
Tori Dunlap:
I love it. I’m supposed to be in LA at the end of February, so I’m definitely going to visit the restaurant and we’d love to meet you. And yeah, that would be great. Thank you so much for being here.
Bricia Lopez:
No, thanks for having me.
Tori Dunlap:
Thank you for listening to Financial Feminists, produced by Her First $100K. If you love the show and want to keep supporting feminist media, please subscribe or follow us on your preferred podcasting platform or on YouTube. Your support helps us continue to bring this content to you for free. If you’re looking for resources, tools, and education, including all of the resources mentioned in this episode, head to http://herfirst100k.com/ffpod.
Financial Feminist is hosted by me, Tori Dunlap. Produced by Kristen Fields and Tamisha Grant. Research by Sarah Sciortino. Audio and video engineering by Alyssa Midcalf. Marketing and Operations by Karina Patel and Amanda Leffew. Special thanks to our team at Her First 100K, Kailyn Sprinkle, Masha Bakhmetyeva, Sasha Bonar, Rae Wong, Elizabeth McCumber, Daryl Ann Ingman, Shelby Duclos, Meghan Walker, and Jess Hawks. Promotional graphics by Mary Stratton, photography by Sarah Wolfe, and theme music by Jonah Cohen Sound. A huge thanks to the entire Her First 100K community for supporting our show.
Tori Dunlap
Tori Dunlap is an internationally-recognized money and career expert. After saving $100,000 at age 25, Tori quit her corporate job in marketing and founded Her First $100K to fight financial inequality by giving women actionable resources to better their money. She has helped over five million women negotiate salaries, pay off debt, build savings, and invest.
Tori’s work has been featured on Good Morning America, the New York Times, BBC, TIME, PEOPLE, CNN, New York Magazine, Forbes, CNBC, BuzzFeed, and more.
With a dedicated following of over 2.1 million on Instagram and 2.4 million on TikTok —and multiple instances of her story going viral—Tori’s unique take on financial advice has made her the go-to voice for ambitious millennial women. CNBC called Tori “the voice of financial confidence for women.”
An honors graduate of the University of Portland, Tori currently lives in Seattle, where she enjoys eating fried chicken, going to barre classes, and attempting to naturally work John Mulaney bits into conversation.
